Speaker 2 (00:13.752)
Welcome back to the Energy Fix, a podcast dedicated to help you balance your energetic body by diving deep into the sweet world of all things health and spirituality. My name's Tansy and I'm an intuitive crystal reiki energy healer, energetic nutrition and holistic health practitioner, and a crystal jewelry designer. It's time to talk all things energy. Let's dive in. Have you ever noticed how your brain, your mind,
really starts to narrate your day, even before you've had a chance to grab a sip of water or comprehend your morning activities. One comment, one memory, and suddenly this inner dialogue, it's taking the wheel and for some, it's already spinning out of control. Here's what I want to tell you. You're not broken. You're just overdue.
to choose who's actually driving the bus. Today, I'm talking to Vahid Coskun He's a globally experienced yoga therapist and mindfulness coach who leads thousands of classes across three continents, blending Eastern wisdom and Western science. He calls his new book, Practice Beyond the Posture, Meet Yourself Through the Mental Dialogues of Yoga. And that's his jam.
That is his jam. You are gonna hear it in this conversation today. It is a conversation that expands into depth and awareness and really allows you to think on such an expansive level. He loves to help you stay in charge of your experience so that you're not defined by a thought or a label or even yesterday's version of who you were.
He loves to help to try to guide you into who you're gonna be. Now, before we jump in, a quick invitation if you're craving a deeper reset. I am going to be at another day of enlightened day at Reiki by Ricky's in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. It's coming up really, really soon. Now, if you're in the area, I would love for you to book a session in person, but know that you don't need to book in person.
Speaker 2 (02:34.122)
you can do distance sessions as well. Now, of course, you can do distance sessions with me anytime, but I will have a bunch of sessions allotted out specifically to be doing this work. So if you want to be part of that crew, then reach out to me, email me via the link in the show notes. We'll find a time that fits to get you in on the schedule and allow you to get that reset that you are really craving.
Now, let's breathe and settle in. Let yourself just allow these words and the energy from Vahid to penetrate into your nervous system and into your soul, inviting in that expansion that I think you are probably craving right now. If you're anything like me, you are craving that so much right now. Here's Vahid Coskun
Let's dive in.
Speaker 2 (03:37.694)
Welcome to the Energy Fix Podcast, Vahid. Thank you so much for being here.
Hey, thanks for having me, Tansy. It's great to be here.
We're going to have such a great conversation. But like I always do when I start these podcasts out, is I want to know about you. Vahid I want to know about you. Not necessarily just the work you do, but you as a soul. And so I would love to know in this stage of your life, is there a word or a phrase that you're really connecting to, that you're feeling really embodied by?
and trying to be more connected to right now.
I think it might be like exploration.
Speaker 1 (04:22.84)
I think it's so easy to put people's lives in some boxes, in some rail guards. And especially if you are relatively successful in the realms that you are put in, you might just be content where you are. But it just keeps coming up to me that my sister is very much into numerology and everything.
The other day she's just like calling me at 2 a.m. She says, your number is seven. Your number is seven. I'm like, what is it? Like I'm like, great. I like number seven, but like, what does that mean? She goes, that means you won't be happy until you find yourself.
I'm like, sure, thank you very much. So that kind of made sense to me because I have done a lot of things in a very successful manner in life, but I never really considered myself as a full success despite other people's perception of me being as such. And it really made me comfortable in a way that I am the guy who cannot speak normally. Like if we are just meeting at a bar,
And this is the first time I'm talking to you. We either don't talk or the second statement is something completely deep off the charts, purpose, meaning, existence, some philosophy. And it kind of made sense to me. I thought I was weird. I didn't know how to do the small talk and I'm not really interested in doing the small talk either, but you know, trying to fit the society. All of a sudden when, when she kind of unloaded on me in terms of how my entire life is about
the purpose, the spirituality, the deep meanings of little stuff. I'm like, then I'm kind of living up to my potential. And it might make me a little bit more curious about the parts of me that I ignored because it wasn't worth according to the values of the current norm. So I'm very curious and doing a lot of exploration right now.
Speaker 2 (06:36.078)
And I think that that's going to resonate with a lot of the listeners because I'm sure that they're
Didn't make sense to you when I say my number is seven
It does. It does. Yes. Yes. I actually love numerology. So it makes a lot of sense to me. And I think it's going to really resonate with a lot of the listeners because there's a lot of people here that I bet really struggle with the small talk and just enjoy diving deep and getting to know more of the soul and what is really laying below the surface. I love that. And so, OK.
So thinking about your exploration, what have you been doing to explore more? How have you allowed yourself to open up to that and to be more curious?
Speaker 1 (07:28.962)
I think the hardest one, I'm gonna give the best and the most recent example that I'm still working for is...
the curiosity about uncomfortable places. Like I know nothing can touch me. Like I know this, I'm convinced. But I also feel the tendency to avoid certain scenarios in life.
One of them was seasonal, like we're quitting the smoke actually. It was, I'm a very normal, very comfortable person. Either I smoke or I don't smoke. But then a few months back, I wanted to just give up smoking completely. And that made me relatively uncomfortable. And I just wanted to go back and smoke another cigarette or whatnot. But just being able to stay in that zone.
and be curious with it. I'm like, like if I am in a dark room and if I hear a sound and if there is no light, I will pat everywhere just to make sure I know what is inside the room. But this is a metaphor. In the same way, I am in a place, I am in a mood, I am in some kind of energy that I am not familiar with. So I kind of want to change it, but I can't change it because the curiosity comes in like.
Like why? Like why do I feel like this? What is this coming from? So it's as if I have a new me in the same body that I live because the routine has changed. When the routine has changed, the thoughts, the sensations and the reference points to those thoughts and sensations have changed. So I'm exploring, like I'm exploring all the different... I took a dance class. Never ever in my life.
Speaker 1 (09:26.966)
Am I gonna dance? I love dancers. I would dance in my closet with my hoodie on, but never in a dancing stage. I took some dancing classes, super awkward. Like the wahid I met there is completely different than the wahid who is teaching you the deep secrets of your life. So I got to meet a little bit awkward versions of me and it's super fun.
I love that. I love that. And that actually really bridges into how I want to just start this podcast off and get deep into it. And I love that you just love diving deep because so do I. Vahid, your name, it starts with a V, but like it's spelled with a V. But it sounds like a W. And so identity right out of the gate. I mean, it is really all about identity.
Right? And so in your world, how does naming what we call ourselves really shape how we show up to the world and how we present ourselves? And I and I would even say, too, like if this if this has shifted and changed and shaped because of your journey to get to where you're at, I would love to hear about that, too, and how that's transitioned you.
Allow the question 100 %
Can I actually interrupt this and then read a chapter from a book that I wrote? Absolutely. Of course. Basically, I wrote another book. This is a short story book and it's called Teachings of a Delusional Monk. And because this is the dangerous territories of the uncharted mind, I wrote guidelines before you read the book. And I would like to read those guidelines. And it says the first guideline, read everything by its name.
Speaker 2 (10:59.203)
Really?
Speaker 1 (11:22.828)
It's true name, not a name you have given to it or invented for it. There's five more things, but this was the one, like read everything by its name. And as it comes to your question,
Speaker 1 (11:39.948)
And even like the way you narrated my name to me because I didn't really know the differentiation between V and W because my Turkish ears kind of doesn't have to make a differentiation between the two and we use the spelling of V for both sounds. It doesn't matter if it's V or V, we spell it with a V. And coming back to my name, I had problems with my name because my full name is Abdul Vahed.
which is, it sounds like a grandfather name in Turkish. You know, I didn't like it as a young person. And then eventually over high school and college, I grew into my name, which my full name. So, Vahid means...
Vahid means the unique one. It's one of the 99 attributes of God. And Abdul Vahid means the servant of the unique one. And very recently, the way I related to my name kind of gave me my life purpose because I always looked at somebody with hidden treasures hiding behind their persona. Like everybody has a treasure and it is incumbent on them
to A, figure out that treasure and then B, serve it to other people. So, I'm looking at everybody like everybody is unique, everybody is kind but like, I'm like, my name is unique. So, I kind of made it my purpose to remind everybody how unique or special they are. But in the same place, because everybody is unique and special, this kind of makes it common. like from our differences, we create a commonality.
Like we are all unique, we are all special but we are at the same time from the same way, the same. So when it went like coming back to the names, I think it's super important. A, what we name ourselves, like we can talk about the names you call you, you know, like four or five years ago, I am a very good mental therapist. I'm a very good friend to give advices to my friends.
Speaker 1 (13:53.794)
but I was living in the pit, like I was at the bottom of the well, dark. And I'm like, why is this? Why is this? Because I care about my clients and my friends and my family, but there was another Vahid in there who was, like I would call myself a dumbass when I made a mistake. And I'm thinking like, if I called a student of mine dumbass, they wouldn't learn from me. So I really have to understand like how I named me.
Like how do I address me? Like when I talk to me, do I say you? When I talk to me, do I say he? Or like pronouns are big today, yeah? I don't really care too much, but I do care the pronouns that you use when you refer to yourself. Like if I'm in charge of my experience, I call it I. I did this, I happen. If I'm in a shamey, belamey, guilty mode, I'm like, you did this, you did that. I'm talking about me, but I address me as you.
Or if I'm like completely dissociated, which I haven't had this, but I examples of other people. Like there's some people who refer to themselves as he or she. Like when they narrate their story, they refer to it in the third person, which is crazy. Like my most comments are like, I either call me as I or we, which me and my super ego, I guess we are still doing some digging.
But I always call him, I'm like, I call myself we like, okay, like we got this. I'm like, who are this we? Yeah, but like naming, how you name, how you identify, that's why people, that's that's the core of my work too. When people come to me with anxiety, I basically make them name the identity that is suffering. You know, if you are a high school student,
and you are going to college, well, the high school student is dying. Like you are not as a person dying, but the identity that you name yourself, the identity that you know yourself and you got comfortable with is dying. And you don't have any other reference point to you. You don't know that you are a beautiful, wholesome, energetic human being. You just think you are a high school student or a college student and now you are graduating and you feel like you are dying. Of course you are dying.
Speaker 1 (16:17.474)
Like an identity is dying and then you just enmeshed yourself with that identity too much.
So yeah, where you name it is what you become.
I love that. So as you're talking about this, I'm overheard writing frantically notes because I do exactly the same thing. I use I when I'm feeling confident, when I'm feeling expansive. I use you when I'm angry at myself and I'm shaming myself. But the thing that I wrote down that was actually a huge aha. I use she when I'm making fun of myself.
When I'm making fun of a behavior or something that I did, I'm like, oh, she is something else or she and that is so I never even thought about that or put two and two together that that's actually a word of mockery that I use when I'm making fun of something that I'm doing.
Also you are distancing yourself from that person.
Speaker 2 (17:24.973)
Yeah, wild. Wow. All right, so let's expand into this even more. Now, your book, your book that, the other book that you have, not teachings of a delusional monk, the other one is called Practice Beyond the Posture. And so I love that. I love that phrase. Yes, hold that book up so we can say it. Practice Beyond the Posture, beautiful. Yeah, I love that beautiful coloring, too.
I love that. When did you realize that you weren't teaching yoga poses, that you were actually teaching people how to be with their own mind?
Speaker 1 (18:07.692)
When I understood how uncomfortable I was being with my own mind
It's a, yoga is great. You know, it's amazing. You can do yoga for whatever reason, but I never did yoga for physical reasons. Like I was an avid athlete. did martial arts for forever in my life. I did rowing in college. So like I was on the front edge of competitiveness in the physical realm at all times. So when I came to yoga, like
kind of wanna like, hey, like this is good, it's a little bit of a stretch, makes my knees feel better. But there is like something else. And because it's so quiet, you just think too much and your thoughts are very loud. And I'm not gonna say I'm a mind reader, but I'm going to say that when you are quiet, the people who are not quiet around you, you can easily hear them. You know, like.
I'm just not even being me. I wouldn't say I'm being me. I'm just here taking a breath in a present moment. And this happens to me when I'm teaching the class too. And I see you think. And it's not necessarily a specific thought, but it's more like, like for example, somebody would look at me and then they roll their eyes. They would be thinking like, you are telling me all these things, but don't you see how hard I am working?
This is a scene that I know the student that I read from and I know the moment and because I'm teaching the class, I can't address it right away. So I took a note and I looked around most of the time. People want somebody to see their suffering. So they have somebody else's permission to rest or relax or anything. don't know. But what I wrote is
Speaker 1 (20:04.266)
I saw that mental dialogue and in the book I write, I know how hard you are working, your friends know how hard you are working, you don't know how hard you are working. Like what happens if you knew you are struggling so much? Well, you would become a little bit more compassionate to yourself. You would start to expect that understanding and outsource it from me and then you entitle that to you. So,
What I understood is that we all have, because we are so unique, we all have a way of relating to everything that's around us. And I think I am lucky enough to create a language around what we are all going through. Like we were talking about the bridge before, I studied translation in my bachelor's degree in Turkey and I came here for master's for the mind-body stuff.
And I never really thought of my translator identity much, but I'm looking at it now. And I said this in the book too, like now I'm a translator between your mind and your heart. Like they don't speak the same language, but they both express themselves. And I changed the reason and logic into feelings and sensations and energy. I am a translator still, but just a different reality.
You know, I'm over here laughing because when you're talking about yoga and the inner dialogue and when I asked you, when I asked you, when did you realize that you were actually teaching people how to be with their own mind? And I said, when did that happen? You said, when I realized I couldn't be with my own mind, right? That got me thinking throughout your talk here of how when I do yoga, it is that one time,
Actually, if I know that I've been holding on to too much energy now I I know yoga helps to move energy through the physical body. It helps to release energy, right? But also That is the time that I probably cry the most and the tears come out because not only am I moving energy but also these thoughts start to come up and I was I was taking some notes while you were talking and I wrote down Look at you
Speaker 2 (22:28.844)
Why is your body feeling so weak? Why are you feeling so aged? You're so not enough. And I this this was just not too long ago when I was doing a yoga practice and just allowing myself to be in that and allowing the tears to flow and those emotions to come out mentally. What a gift. And the fact that you have bridged that and you took it past just the posture and the poses.
but you also incorporate that mental dialogue. That's powerful.
Thank you. like being enough is so I don't necessarily want to categorize things, but there is probably four different teams of the mental dialogue. Meet yourself through the mental dialogues, right? And I kind of put some braces around it. So one of them is what is enough according to who? From which point? Basically, I like to
First make you hear the things that you think and then give you a percept, give you an understanding of from which point
Or from which perspective does your reality seem this way? Like you are only not enough in that moment from a certain point which you used you again, you know, when you're addressing you like, so, okay, let's imagine the time love of space and time like Einstein imagined, right? Like there's a whole reality and then you are looking at sun from the earth. You are like, such a beautiful thing.
Speaker 1 (24:11.402)
or you are looking at the sun from Mercury, you are melting too much, or you are looking at the sun from a far away galaxy. So your perception, your point of reference affects your reality because you don't know that, like you have a whole other place you will never get to see because we are human. only have frontal view and a little bit of periphery. We never get to see what's behind us. So like when you are stuck in those moments,
first recognizing the moment and then even if you don't see it, knowing that there's other perspective to this specific moment is a huge freedom to begin with.
Wow. And so, okay, let's stay right here with these mental dialogues. Are we talking inner narrator, protective parts, cultural conditioning, like, or is it all above? Like, what are we talking about? How do we know which voice is telling us the truth in these mental dialogues that we're having?
The voice that's not trying to convince you is the true voice, probably.
But I think that can be confusing sometimes because it sounds like all of them are trying to convince, or all of them are the truth, right?
Speaker 1 (25:27.16)
Yeah. Like it's hard. Like it's very hard because we take pride in being sophisticated, complicated, courageous, right? But intuition is just so, so wise, so mellow. It's like we put everything else. Like I also believe that the baseline reality of earth or of life is peace, but we build constructs on
Like we put more ideas, more emotions and furthermore, this is an easy example to give, but if your identity, for example, Vahid, 20 years old, did not know what a stress or anxiousness was, like is it possible for a person to live 20 years without anxiety? Realistically, no. But if you ask Vahid at 20 years old, he never was nervous.
ever. So if like if your identity is at odds with your intuition, you will come up with a whole bunch of creative, smart, intelligent, mischievous way of riding over that intuition. Like my intuition would tell me that, maybe like I should sit down and then work with this thing that I might be feeling in my stomach.
but no no no why it is never nervous so I would be like this gotta be something else rewrite, reframe which is a great skill but it is like you can rewrite and reframe when you can sit with the truth but don't rewrite and reframe because you wanna avoid the truth
Speaker 2 (27:11.808)
when your system keeps whispering, I'm overloaded. That's not weakness. That's wisdom.
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And if you've never had a session with me, here's what clients report. They feel calmer and they have deeper sleep that same week. They notice that their breath is a little bit more easy and they have less chest pressure or jaw clenching. Their mental clarity returns and decision fatigue starts to actually drop. They have better digestion because stress is not there gunking everything up.
physical pain starts to lessen and they begin to feel more present and less hijacked by other people's energy. And they learn how to implement this kind of practice into their everyday so they can start to feel the results on their own over and over and over. When your nervous system is regulated, everything works better. You have more focus, your hormones are more balanced, your digestion is better.
your mood is more stable. Healing isn't about doing more. It's actually about less noise so your body's own intelligence can do what it's built to do. Sessions are available in person if you are local to where I'm at or distance worldwide. Both are powerful. Head over to tansyrodgers.com
Speaker 2 (29:09.554)
and you can schedule or reach out to me to ask any questions that you have on the tip of your brain. You can tap the link in the show notes and make it super easy to book and get on my schedule. If your body is asking for more quiet, to be more clear, to feel more true, let's bring your energy home.
Yeah. Well, so I like what you said in the very beginning of this whole question and this part of the conversation. You said, you know, your intuition is just calm. It's just peaceful. It isn't it isn't these narratives that we make up in our head. It just is. And so that's that's really great to have that distinction. But now let's talk about the physical body.
You know, stay staying in charge of your experience, staying in charge of your identity, how you're speaking to yourself, how you're presenting yourself to yourself. Right. What does it feel like? What does it feel like in your body? Not just from an idea, but from an actual physiological reaction. What does it look like when you're not in charge?
Speaker 1 (30:29.326)
I think what does it look like when you are in charge is this. Nothing looks different but just the way of your attitude. Like for example imagine a challenging pose or imagine just holding a squat for two minutes. Okay.
When you are not in charge of your own experience, your legs will start to shake, your thighs will start to burn, and you will think how not strong enough you are. Or you will blame how you didn't eat or how you didn't sleep enough.
Or you would think, I had done this yesterday, I would be able to do this. Or if you look at the teacher or the instructor, you said, why do you even have to hold this position too much? Like the guy is just being egoistic and then making us suffer. So the way you relate to the burning of the ties will affect your mental eloquence of how you narrate the story. It's either about
What you should have done, what you would have done or what somebody else should have done or should do. But when you are in charge of your own experience, it could look like this. my legs are going through. So it's not me. I'm not going through a hard time. My legs are going through a hard time. My legs are shaking and I am trying to... The easiest anchor is your breath. I'm just trying to breathe properly. Strong breaths.
I'm just trying to control what I can control. Or your legs are shaking and you are happy. Like see there is another person, your legs are shaking. When your body is tired, when your body feels bad, you start to feel bad as a person. But when you are in charge of your own experience, maybe you will even be happier when your body is exhausted because, hey, I wanted to test the physical limits of this body.
Speaker 1 (32:46.348)
And the limit is here today. Now I am shaking. And the legs are shaking are not because they are weak. It's because they are upgrading a new software. My nerves are getting stronger and this is the download. This is how I install the new program. Or maybe you are thinking, my legs are shaking, but I have to pay more attention. Like you can, it's like a father or like a mentor and a child.
Like the child is apprentice is struggling here, but the mentor knows that those struggles will amount to something good. So I think the most important way of staying in charge of your own experience is not to get swept by different identity. I call people out generally when I can, like when they say, I'm so tired. I'm like, excuse me, you ignorant person.
with all the love in my heart you don't know who you are you can say that your legs are tired you can say your mind is tired you can say whatever is tired but if you don't know who you are don't say I'm tired because your subconscious brain takes that as reality
I feel like you're calling me out and you don't even know. I was literally saying
Look at this right there, I'm just talking in j-
Speaker 2 (34:07.022)
I was literally saying all day today, I'm so tired. Because I've just like, today is kind of cloudy here. I got enough sleep, but I just woke up tired, you know, and it's just been kind of that day. And I'm literally have been saying all day, I'm so tired. And so here's the thing, though, I never even thought about how that is shaping my identity.
of who I am, palm to face. Like I can't even, I can't even, I can't even believe that aha. And so.
You know, when you were talking about, when you were talking about the analogy of when you're on the mat, my legs are shaky. You know, maybe I'm not as, you know, my ankles aren't as strong as they could be right now. Like you're really getting, I was thinking to myself back when I was telling you about all of those thought processes that go through when I do yoga, my most inadequate thought patterning,
is happening when I'm not present and I'm not being real. When my brain is scanning everything else, you know, the instructor, what I look like to the people around me, my mat, how my ankle is shaking when I'm trying to do a certain balance pose, right? And I'm not actually staying present and rooted in my strength, rooted in myself, rooted in my identity.
And the fact that I am this woman who came here to this mat to create a practice to help expand and open myself. No, I'm everywhere else. And so that is such a great analogy of how to even just bring it back and allow yourself to be in that depth of presence.
Speaker 1 (36:12.311)
If I may add a little bit to it, the...
It's I don't really know it's like a chicken and egg situation But if I'm not comfortable here, I will leave right like if I don't like my environment People are talking too much not my people I will leave the same happens between your body and your mind like your body can't really leave anywhere but when you are not happy in the body then it will be about other people other things yesterday's or tomorrow's or something and
I am talking a lot about the relationship between your body and your mind and how that relationship should be studied a little bit more because and actually the best ways of like trauma bonding, right? Remember your worst friend, like remember your best friends. You all had to suffer together something and then made it out the other end and now you guys are great friends.
So the trauma is the yoga class, the trauma is the running, the trauma is the stressful work meeting. But because the stressful work meeting is just so stressful, your body is there, your body is going through because it's sitting in the room with the other bosses or whatever, but your mind is kind of free so it checks out. At the end of the day, the mind dissociated somewhere and the body had to be stuck in there. So when you go home, the body gives you aches because you ignored it.
but the mind kind of numbs it off and then does its thing again. So can you make your body and your mind a very good friend in which one is going through a hard time, the other shows up? Like we call this top down or bottom up regulations, but I think it's just easier to just look at like two friends. Like your body is suffering. You are, I don't know, doing a headstand or you are in the pose or you are just suffering.
Speaker 1 (38:08.106)
And because this is just so unbearable, your mind checks out.
and this leaves your body to suffer alone. Like is it possible to bring your mind in because your mind is smart like your mind is like, okay, like the hips are working so much, the abs are engaged, the ribs are opened, we need more breath here. Like it's for a reasonable mind, it's so easy, okay like let's breathe a little bit more or maybe your mind will take, this is kind of too much, we need a break. Or maybe the mind will look at the body and then say, hey like.
You're suffering right now, but you can do a little bit more. Maybe, maybe it will be a good friend, you know, a good friend supports you when you are down and pushes you when you can. But again, like our mind and most people's relationship between their body and mind is the most toxic relationship ever. Like people are talking about exes, my boss was like this.
Leave it alone. I know the most toxicity is in you because you treat your body like a slave. Like your body has to do this. And then when the body kind of has enough then becomes a prima donna because you you burn you break your knee or you get some kind of injury. Then the mind has to cater the needs of the body. It's just extremes. Like can they find a middle ground? Can they kind of get along? You know?
No, it doesn't happen. One has to intoxicate. Your brain discards the signals of your body and your body kind of intoxicates the brain with different pains and sensations. They don't even get along. They don't even know that they are cohabitating in the same place.
Speaker 2 (39:53.644)
Hmm. Yeah. And so I'm over here kind of chuckling because I think to myself, like mindfulness gets this whole reputation of being so so serene and pretty and just peaceful and expensive. You're shaking your head. No, right away. Yeah, because real presence is gritty. It's gritty. Yeah. So messy. So, OK. Well, he tell me.
I see.
Speaker 2 (40:23.754)
What's the difference between spiritual performance and genuine awareness, either on the mat or in life in general? like, what is that difference? And how does presence show up so gritty?
Speaker 1 (40:46.296)
Tough question, good question, tough question. I'll try to answer it in a broader perspective. I think the real presence shows up when you don't prioritize the body, mind or spirit. Like because we are living physical lives, some people just care too much about the body. You know, the body has to be right.
And they care a little bit about the mind, but they have no idea about what is the spirit. It's the voodoo, good stuff they don't want to listen to. And there's people here, especially around where I am, like very high stress type A mentality. But I was like, before I moved here, I was living in Hawaii. And for those people, it's as if life is just ecstasy and spirituality and a butterfly. Like, suffered so much that they are just over there.
pretending like they are spirits floating in heaven.
spiritual bypassing too.
Yeah. So there is three levels. Either you numb everything off with the physical exhaustion of hard work or you are too smart and you intellectualize everything or everything is just like you said, spiritual bypassing. we are all one. There is no mistake. There is mistakes. There are judgments. You've got to be able to discern between what is right and what is wrong. Maybe you don't accept other people's definitions of it, but you do have to have your own definition of what is right and what is wrong.
Speaker 1 (42:22.124)
You can't live a life like that otherwise. So the real presence is probably being able to understand that your body, your mind and your soul have equal importance. One is not more important or more profound than the other. And it's kind of like I lived with those people and then maybe I was a hippie boy back in the day. I also taught that like we put so much emphasis on being spiritual, the energy.
this and that, which I'm not diminishing it because for some people it just doesn't even exist. It's all like logic, reason, mind, body. I think it's the balance. Like, I really can't access the wisdom of my soul when my body is trembling. Like when I didn't do anything good to my body, you know? And then people are like,
Yeah, but like I had this enlightenment when I was going through my cancer treatment and then my body was at the worst. Well, your body was not at the worst. It was the first time maybe you started paying attention to your body because it had cancer.
Am I getting to the point that I wanted to go? Like these are the same things and the more you ignore one, the stronger it's going to come out later. You can't, you can't ignore your physical body. Like you can't be a monk sit in a lotus pose forever. It just won't happen. You still got to stretch those legs. You still got to, maybe you can eat once a week, but you still eat. are, there are like weeks I didn't eat, but I came back and I ate.
If I want to keep going, you've got to eat. You know, I was, I just wanted, I spent most of my twenties wanting to get enlightened. Like I just couldn't have it any other way. I just got to get enlightened. And I did everything. I stayed in caves. I did 10, 20 days of no food, no speak, whatever. But I understood that, like we are here for a reason and there's an equal balance and equal beauty.
Speaker 1 (44:33.896)
on running for two hours, fasting for two hours or partying for two hours. It's just awesome. As long as...
Speaker 1 (44:44.544)
I don't know, like I think if I could say what I wanna say right now, it would be the secret to enlightenment, but it's just something like that.
I am, yes, to all of that. I literally just had this conversation the other day. so, and so I, you know, my first real spiritual awakening was in about 2012. And I went through this whole time where I was shifting and really diving in. And then I dialed back and I was back more into human experience. However, like a video game.
I was up on that next level, right? However, 2020, 2021 comes around maybe even before that a little bit. I'm gonna say 2018, 2019. I start going through the next level and I start shifting and changing. Now I'm diving into everything spiritual and I'm listening and soaking things up like a sponge, reading all the books, listening to all the podcasts, getting all the tools, being so deep.
in it and it felt great. And then I hit a point, I don't know exactly what year this was, this might have been around 22, 23. I hit a point where I'm like, okay, life is very real and all this stuff is amazing and I'm going to keep that knowledge and I'm going to bring it back into my body and I need to be here because I had a lot of big life shifts that were happening, a lot of really
hard human experiences that I had to work through. And so I brought that stuff back and I was utilizing the tools and the thought processes while I'm living in this human body and being in these human experiences. And then I started going through these emotions and I started thinking and this is all very now we're very recent and I started having all these thoughts when he and I'm like, you know, some days
Speaker 2 (46:50.7)
I want to sit on the yoga mat and I want to listen to shamanic drumming and I want to just be in the most peaceful, serene place. And literally the next day I want to go out and have a burger and a beer and I want to listen to all of the really great music that my soul comes alive at because I'm realizing that it is really, it's really about
being spiritual and having the tools. But we're meant to be here in this human body and embody all of that together and be that bridge, that bridge of both. Does that make sense?
Yeah, that was like what we and my sister were going through a while back. We are like sitting down, super spiritual, shedding some tears and just aha moment like we are both in ecstasy. And like, I don't know, some minutes later, five to 10 minutes later, she goes, let's make some pasta.
And then you just get back into it. Like it's so raw. It's so real. Like, like you are here in the most elegant form and then you will go over there, defecate. And you are the same person. Like the one who is crying here because I saw this. And then the one who is rock partying outside. It's, I think the whole spectrum kind of makes the whole thing beautiful. And what is suffering is to
stick to a certain part of the spectrum. Like if I just want to keep eating pizza or just keep looking at the clouds and then be spiritual, if a part of me kind of wants to stick to that part of the life experience, then there's going to be way more suffering than normal.
Speaker 2 (48:47.854)
Yes, I agree with you. I agree with you. You know, as I've let some of my edges and my boundaries in where I thought that I needed to be, as I've let some of that fade a little bit, I have definitely noticed that there's so many more experiences that I've enjoyed more. And I feel, I actually feel more spiritual.
because of allowing myself to expand into the human experience at the same time.
100%. There is nothing more spiritual than going to McDonald's drive through and getting a diet coke for me. I love it. It's like a gift.
Because it's all about the senses, really, right? that sensual sense part of the human experience is obviously very human. But a lot of times I think that we forget that when you allow yourself to engage and to be there, it shifts your energy and allows that energy to expand into higher, to higher dimension, to higher healing.
Do know I mean? Yeah. Yeah. so interesting. If you want your daily rituals to live on your body, meet B.E.U. Crystals, my line of therapeutic intention coded jewelry. These aren't just pretty pieces. They're designed to support your nervous system, focus and confidence in real life. And here's what makes them different and stand out against anything that you're going to see out there.
Speaker 2 (50:30.85)
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Speaker 2 (52:24.642)
So going back to something you said earlier, you were talking about keeping the mind from checking out from the body. Yeah. And I wanted to ask you, how do we keep the mind from actually checking out? we're so stuck, like, what do you do?
Well, first you gotta recognize it. it's, it's, I was going through one of my challenging or messy breakups. I would, when you are not aware, like I am kind of having a conversation, a dialogue with my mind, which will never happen. I will never see this person again. I will never talk about these subjects, but I am sitting here and then having a full on dialogue in my mind for hours.
for hours or days. So the first thing of making sure you don't check out is to know that you have checked out. Because when you lack that awareness, it's your reality. I, if I go back to 2021 and then find the wahid sitting on the couch by himself having all these dialogues, like for him, that was the only reality.
But now I am looking at it like if he just had taken his head from those horse glasses and then looked around, that was a whole different reality too. So the first and probably the hardest step is recognition that you have checked out. Otherwise you won't be able to come back. And then this will take like first you understand that you check out.
And then next time you checked out, maybe you will spend like two hours, three hours, four hours in that checked out state. And then you might want to bring yourself back. And then the time span kind of shortens depending on the severity of the circumstance. But I think awareness, really basic stuff. I wish I had a more sophisticated answer for it, but it starts with your breath awareness.
Speaker 1 (54:35.746)
You know, if you are not paying attention to your breath, you are already checked out. We are not talking about whether you are checked out or not. We are talking about the depth of your checking out, right? And if you are not paying attention to your breath, you are somewhere else for sure. So come back, start with your breath.
I actually think the simplicity of that answer is perfect. Because it's always about awareness and the fact that when you don't recognize that you're breathing or that the depth of the breath is not there. I mean that's such, that's something so simple that we can tune into. Yeah. Well, as we're talking about this identification piece, this identity piece, I feel like identification can be so sneaky.
I mean, there's identities that people really cling to. The good one, the healer, the achiever, the victim. There's so many things. How do we soften these identities that we really connect to, that we live and breathe our life by? How do we soften these without losing ourself?
Well, in order to find yourself, you need those identities too in a way. Like you can't give up something you don't know what it is. So that's the, that's the paradox in life, you know. You do have to get it to give it. So I think a point of non-attachment to the identities is important. Like I do have to be the best mindset coach that I can be.
and I do have to take pride in it and I do have to struggle with it but when the day comes I have to be able to give it right away. Like the funny example of this is I recently moved to a new neighborhood, a nicer place and I have a whole bunch of land around me and there's fences and there's my neighbor's land. So last night it's dark and I'm walking around.
Speaker 1 (56:48.46)
I'm just looking around. Some stars, some design, I hear some sound like that. Kind of made me scared. I looked around, I walked towards the fence and it's almost pure dark. And I had my phone's flashlight in my hand. The neighbor's horses, they have two horses. And then they are like, I think they just wanna play. They wanna meet me.
And I was thinking about the content that I have to create, the videos that I should make, the calls that I'm gonna take the next day. And all of a sudden, I was just this weird entity with a little light in his hand in the middle of the night because I had to see me from the eyes of the horse. Like I'm not any of this. I'm not any of the things that I am trying to make it happen, which I am, I am doing good.
But the beautiful thing is, to the eyes, to the big beautiful eyes of those horses, I was like an alien. I wasn't even a human because it was so dark they couldn't see me and I had a flashlight so they were probably more appalled. And it kind of made me, I'm like, yeah, like all these identities are helping me but I remembered my pure identity when those horses saw me. And it made me super happy. So I think
A good way of relating to yourself is all these titles are good.
Speaker 1 (58:22.638)
but you do have to have a wider and more secure point of being able to refer to yourself. That's why those are horse therapies. I used to take small corporate groups to a horse farm because when we make an activity with the horses and then we come back and they tell me what happened with the horses. And then the guy would say, the horse got upset with me.
Or the other guy said, the horse chose, like basically you are adding all of your projection to the horse. The horse is a horse. Like I also, that's why I love different points of perspectives when I refer to me, like for the horse, was like a midget because the horse was taller than me. I'm 6'4". Like I'm generally the tallest guy in the room, but the horse is taller than man. He's like, what is this? So I,
I love the freedom of being able to do it all. I like to refer to myself as a breath breathing human being from old esoteric poems. Yeah. But I also have unshakable identities too, you know, like if, if I am giving the lecture, I'm the best lecturer. Like if I am presenting, I'm the best speaker. If I'm playing in the, in the field, I'm the best whatever, you know.
Yeah. And so that makes a lot of sense because you also bridge Eastern wisdom and Western science. You bring that all together, which it feels like that creates this ball of wisdom that you just talked about. I would love to talk about how these two harmonize. Where do they harmonize beautifully and where do they talk past each other when it comes to stress, the nervous system, suffering?
Identity.
Speaker 1 (01:00:17.528)
Let's start with identity because that's the biggest or the most apparent example. From the East, you gotta be selfless. You gotta be devoted to God, devoted to service, it's amazing. it's basically you are putting yourself in the background which there is not even yourself, yourself, your ego, it's something bad, you have to eliminate it.
and then put yourself in the higher purpose, which is amazing. It teaches you a lot. You always know how to care for other people, and that. But again, the East is not the East anymore. They like everybody in the East has an iPhone too, or some iPad, some smartphone, some connection to technology. The beautiful thing in the West is, hey, like you gotta be your own person. You gotta be selfish. You gotta fend for yourself, defend yourself, ask for your rights, this, this, this, which looks almost...
Irritating, abrasive from, like we are in a community, why don't you care, like, can you not care about that person? Empathy, this and that. So I think it's in both cultures.
It's trying to, it's being tried to live in an extreme way. And in a way, the one in the West is working than the one in the East right now, because with all this stimuli, you can't really have a taste of what is it being like being selfless. But if you can actually realize yourself, you end up in like, it's like you go to the right, you go to the left, but then we end up in the same spot. If you take the whole way.
Like the most selfish, self-driven, money-oriented people that I know here are the most selfless, the most loving, the most caring people at the same time. Because they have gone the way, the whole way. Like I'm talking to these guys 50, 60 now, and then people are saying, you wouldn't even talk to this guy when he was 30. He was a cutthroat guy. I'm like, I'm glad he took it out of his system. So I think if we understand
Speaker 1 (01:02:25.016)
the importance of the self from the Western point and the importance of serving to a higher power or community from the East, that's the perfect amalgamate. That's the perfect match. Because if I have no idea of who I am and I just did everything for the mosque, for the church, for the community, for the cows, and then
It happened that people in the mosque, the church, the community, in the job didn't appreciate what I did. Now I start to become a very bitter, resentful person. Like, I gave all this, I gave, I gave, I gave, but nothing in the back. Well, if you gave everything, expecting something, you didn't give it the right way in the first place, which I don't blame you. You are like young.
It doesn't matter, you can be 60 years old, but you are young in terms of understanding the dynamics of life. you never, you always, I guess you gave because you expected that the community would take care of you. Not God, not higher power, not energy. You put your trust in other people. And then you said that if I keep giving, they will give back to me. And then we say you lick your palm in Turkish. I don't know. It's, you know what I mean? Like you got nothing. So.
On the flip side, at least the guy who worked his entire life and made all the money and then carried his world aspirations, he's sad too. He's just looking at all this money. it was all futile. know, what really mattered was connection. Well, at least with your money, you can tell other people to go connect. Whereas this guy, he's poor or she is poor and she's bitter and she's resentful and she's kind of...
developing this pessimistic world of life. That's why we have a lot of old guys with resentful, confused, like bitter intellect. Like, please, you know, don't...
Speaker 1 (01:04:34.06)
Like that is the toxicity of the East and the West. And I think the modalities of both in a way makes a whole. That's why I'm like super happy I'm from Istanbul. Like I'm sitting in Asia, I'm looking at Europe or vice versa. know, also the, in this cover, I like to just show it. I'm in Europe and the background is in Asia. So I am.
I got the taste of both worlds and super great question though, like in terms of that one thing, the identity helps the rest too because it was a very long question, like deep question. I just looked at it from the point of identity, but I think it covered the rest too a little bit.
It did. It did. Yeah. And so you're talking about these belief systems and I love, I love that, but I'm really curious on your end, what's one belief system or sorry, what's one belief that you held onto tightly as a teacher that you really had to outgrow to become more honest, more free?
Just do it. Yeah. Like just, like I just, you know, I started to become a yoga teacher when I was, and it wasn't just yoga teaching. was teaching English when I was in Turkey. I am here doing other stuff, but like my mentality in life is like, you just got to do it. Like get it done, put the effort, stop thinking, stop doing this, this, this, this, just get it done, which is a great perspective.
You're Nike.
Speaker 1 (01:06:13.55)
But it emerged a little bit. think when I changed my point of view in terms of like how, like doing it is great, but like who are you becoming when you are doing what you are doing? You know, if you are just doing all that hard work and then turning more resentful and more bitter, you have some thinking to do. So.
From that point, like, just do it. I came to the point, it's like, hey, like, notice how we are doing it. Because me knowing how bad you are doing doesn't help you. But you knowing how bad you are doing helps everybody else. So from the point of like, just get it done, put the work, put your head down. It's like, hey, like, look within, like look within you, around you. Notice what you have been up to.
Because we need you, like we need the real you. You know what I mean? We don't need the you that you are trying to show off. We need the real one.
Yeah, and so that beautifully goes into my next question for you. You know, as a yoga therapist, you've got tools for this regulation. You've got tools to really help you just do it, to just move forward. And so I would love if you could give us maybe a micro practice.
that the listeners can do if they're in the middle of a tense meeting, a traffic jam, a conflict at home, maybe 60 seconds, no mat, no props, just a micro practice to really get you back into your identity, but back into your balance, back into your presence.
Speaker 1 (01:08:13.422)
First, before you practice, pay attention to your breath. Because when you are stressed, you lose up to 25 points of IQ. And I can't really teach you anything when you are down 24 points. Unless you are a genius, it will put you into a very low levels of IQ standard when you are stressed, you know?
thank goodness, I was worried.
Yeah, if you're a genius, like let's say you are over 140, that will make you like an average person. But if you are an average person, you will go into very morbid places.
So first pay attention to your breath and the best thing that I do and I still do it is lengthen your exhales. Because you gave so many examples you said meeting, traffic, at home. We could come up with different things for all of this but one that applies the most is check with the length of your exhales. For example in a speaking job if I am
If I turn out to be nervous, I just run my sentences to an I add a little bit more when I speak, I don't really breathe. And the more I speak, the more I let the sentences on and on and on without actually having to take the breath. The next breath that comes in is just so deep. I intentionally lengthen the exhale, lengthen the exhale. And this puts you in a very constricted space in which your next natural instinct
Speaker 1 (01:09:52.992)
is not to breathe from your nose or the throat. It is the real deal, the diaphragm. So, if you are speaking, you just can keep speaking forever without having any other person understand what you are doing. If you are quiet, if you can do it by yourself, find the natural end of your exhale and exhale a little bit more.
Just observe the next coming breath. Do this three or four times, it will change. You can do it right now. Find the end of the exhale, exhale a little bit longer, and let the next breath happen.
Speaker 2 (01:10:37.134)
I love that.
Yeah. Like when you do this three, four times, that thing that starts to enlarge at the bottom of your lung, it's actually your diaphragm. And then you can keep enlarging it. Like we don't really know it is there, but when you find the end of the exhale, you know where it is. And then you can just keep breathing into it. So do this five times.
I can talk another 30 minutes of how many things, many markers change in your body, in your mind, in your psyche.
Yeah, I love that. Super simple. Can do that anywhere. Yeah. And very, very helpful.
I mean, even when I was telling you like I just wanted to make a long sentence to catch the end of my breath. The next one came in. I'm like, Oh, I thought I was reading with my diaphragm, but it's just a little bit more here. Maybe I gained like another four or five points.
Speaker 2 (01:11:34.382)
Tell us about your book. Tell us about why you wrote it. What is in your book? How it can help to shift people? I want to hear more about what's going on in there in that book of yours.
Speaker 1 (01:11:58.456)
Well, it's about what you think.
And I, the yoga poses are just metaphors or reference points. So you know why we are talking, but this is very applicable to outside of the yoga room too, because I'm not talking about the poses. I'm talking about the person who is doing the poses and the way you think, the way you relate to yourself and your environment and the causes of these like
What you believe makes you think a certain thought. That thought makes you feel in a certain way. That feeling urges you to act in a certain way. And that action creates a result.
That is the condition that you are living in today. Like you are literally living the results of your beliefs of yesterday. So this sounds like theory, but I break this down separately in the book in many different scenarios, like how your legs are shaking and then you start to feel bad about yourself, how something distracts you and then you allow your attention to be
exploited by that distraction rather than reverting it back to yourself. How you relate to authority, how you, like if you are an authority pleaser, if you are dismissing the authority or if you use the authority as something to help you. And also what is authority for you? Like is the authority the teacher? Is the authority the social life? Is the authority something that is from within? Because we all have external authorities as a growing
Speaker 1 (01:13:51.51)
young people. But I think what makes an adult is having that authority within themselves.
So in the book, I talk.
Another Another thing I talk is like how you talk to yourself. Imagine narrating this moment with a golf tournament, with a PGA golf tournament commentator, Now, Abdulvayat Joshkun is opening up the new subject. Or let's say this moment is being narrated from a Latin American commentator. Or is this, da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da
But the way you narrate it to yourself makes your reality. So, in the book I tell you about you, I tell you about you, I tell you about you and at the end I ask you how are you?
Like really long story short, it's good. And then some people do tell me that, like, are you a mind reader? I generally tell people, when they ask me, what is this book about? I'm like, the book about is you. I looked at you, I saw what you taught and I wrote things down. And sure enough, a few days later, they're like, you weren't lying.
Speaker 2 (01:15:10.446)
Which is awesome because I feel like so many people have a struggle with really knowing themselves and even allowing them their their their glasses or their perception to shift, right? And so so an outside force coming in and just opening up the book for them. No pun intended. Opening the book for them and just allowing that person to really
be present and to see and then allowing that person to expand and open even further at the end, think is beautiful.
Speaker 2 (01:15:51.25)
well, before we really get into where people can buy the book, where people can find you, I am going to try something a little different. I'm going to do what I'm going to call rapid fire. And so I just want to know more about you, Vahid. I want to
Getting into a dangerous waters tansy
I know this is exciting. I want to know about you and I just want to do just three rapid fire questions. Learn more about the depth of you. All right. So here we go. Are you ready?
Okay.
Speaker 1 (01:16:24.298)
I guess I shouldn't be ready because the first answer comes to my mind is going to be the answer, right?
Exactly. You got it. So then you are ready. This is perfect. All right. So number one, complete this sentence. When I am most myself, my mind sounds like...
a dinosaur.
I didn't think about it.
Perfect, beautiful. Sounds like a dinosaur. I love that. All right, number two. Number two. What question do you wish students asked you more?
Speaker 1 (01:17:13.516)
I'm not thinking it's just blank. What questions do I think? Students ask me more.
Speaker 1 (01:17:22.85)
Can we do it again?
Mmm.
Yeah, can we do it again? It's like we hit a very blank place. Yeah, can we do it again?
Awesome. right. Number three and the last one. posture is your favorite and why? Is that because you like to just lay as a corpse?
Shalastin.
Speaker 1 (01:17:51.294)
I'm very present, you know, I can, it's funny if do I have my bookmark has has all that stuff has some postures on it. And it says I like it all but this is my favorite. And it's Shalasna. It's the hardest posture ever. It's easy to do other postures. Yeah.
That's true because then you have to... I actually find myself the most fidgety in Shavas.
Yeah, I was just thinking about fidgeting. I'm like, like not being comfortable. I'm like, why do I fidget? Because like a thought or an emotion comes and the body is not ready for it. can't be present with it. So it has to come like even when somebody talks to me, if I don't want to listen to them, like my toes are doing something else, you know, it's like the toes are not here or my mind just eyes are looking or confirming. But I think
That Fijiding is from that too. Yeah. I it. am very me. I am like very very me.
that. this has been fantastic.
Speaker 1 (01:19:00.558)
The first question surprised me too, I have to dive into the dinosaur part.
ahead, where can people find you? Where are you hanging out? What are you most excited about? And of course, where can people find your book?
or the book you can just go to Amazon and write practice beyond the posture. It was a bestseller last two weeks in yoga and emotional health. check it out. Maybe we can put this on the podcasting my website. If you want to work one on one with me or if you want to bring me to your company to do a mindfulness session or a wellness day party, can check out wellnessassemblieservices.com which has the pages for the
private coaching, corporate stuff for the book and the events too. And if you find a little bit of an informal, normal meetup of what I'm up to, you can find me on Instagram, ACOSKUN, which is going to be somewhere up here.
Yeah, and I'll make sure to have all of those links down in the show notes for easy access so you can just click and go. This has been such a great conversation.
Speaker 1 (01:20:18.072)
Benzi, I exceptionally love this. Thank you so much.
Yeah. Do you have any last words that you want to lay on the hearts of the listeners for today before we sign off?
like David Goggins just yells, stay hard, should say, stay curious. You are living in a, like, this is the bio machine, the most advanced device that we ever have. Like you don't really have much to say on the hardware, but you can always change the software. Like stay curious guys.
Thank you so much. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much for the work you're doing. appreciate you.
for having me thank you so much Tansy
Speaker 2 (01:21:00.27)
listening to this, if something inside of you just got a little quieter, trust that. You don't have to silence your mind to really lead your life. You just have to remember that you're the one choosing which voice actually gets the microphone. Which voice are you going to give the microphone to? Remember, if this episode really connected with you, if this open and expanded you, if this
Influenced or inspired you in any way share it out to those that you know need it that you want to inspire as well and Take a moment jump on over to where you listen to this episode and give it a rating give it a review This helps the show grow and I appreciate it so much as You move forward this week. Here are a few questions and reflection to jump back into and to connect with
When my mind starts narrating, who is actually speaking and who do I want leading? And which belief has been driving me that no longer feels true to my body? And finally, if I stayed in charge of my experience today, what would presence look like in one ordinary moment? And until next time,
Keep spreading that beautiful energy you were born to share.
