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Welcome back to the Energy Fix, a podcast dedicated to help you balance your energetic body by diving deep into the sweet world of all things health and spirituality. My name's Tansy and I'm an intuitive crystal reiki energy healer, energetic nutrition and holistic health practitioner, and a crystal jewelry designer. It's time to talk all things energy. Let's dive in.
You know how some memories just keep on knocking? Not to necessarily drag you back, but to ask, will you finally see what I'm trying to give you? That's the secret power of story. It isn't a highlight reel or a report of what happened. It's living energy. And when witnessed, it can really become direction. When allowed, it can become life transforming.
I know so many times in my own life, I really just pushed all of those memories away because they felt too painful. They felt too vulnerable. But when I allowed myself to really open up and just be aware, to stay curious, to stay in that place of openness and expansion, even though it was really scary to look at, something shifted within me.
Today I'm with Laura Patak, an entrepreneur, a formal global exec who's lived and led across seven countries on five different continents, and author of stories with purpose. Laura's gift isn't performing her story, it's handing you the mirror so that you can recognize your own strength. And that word vulnerability that I used just a little bit ago, well this is vulnerability with a back.
It's honesty with momentum and push. It's the kind of conversation that makes your insides, your gut really just nod and say, yes, yes, yes, that right there. Now, a quick heads up before we dive into this conversation. If you want to meet in person, if you are going to be local in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania this weekend,
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I am going to be at the Spirit of Oneness Expo in Harrisburg, PA at the Scottish Rite on October 4th and 5th. That is this coming weekend if you are listening to this in real time. You'll find me down on the bottom floor back in the left side corner. This is where I'm at every year and I absolutely love it because it's my own little nook to be able to hang out, to talk, to educate, to look at all things
pretty in jewelry and crystals and to catch up with clients that I haven't gotten to see since last year. So it is a great time and I would love for you to come out and say hi and also get a little mini crystal match. See what you might need and where you're at right now. I can help you out with that. All right. Let's get into this conversation. Here's Laura Patak. Let's dive in.
Welcome to the Energy Fix Podcast. Laura, thank you so much for being here today.
Nancy, thank you so much for having me. And I'm so excited that we are going to have an amazing time together. And also your listeners and viewers, they're going to have a blast listening to us.
Yeah, well, and I agree because honestly, you know, what has been at the heart of humankind, human consciousness, human evolution, but storytelling. And it has been a piece of our human history, how we share emotion, memories, experiences, tales, rituals.
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There's so much in storytelling and that's what we're going to be talking all about today. So I feel like this is going to land very deep into the hearts of listeners.
amazing let's just do it
Yeah. Okay. Well, to really start this podcast out, know, Laura, typically I ask people, is there a word or a phrase that you're really embodying? Because I love to get to know you on a personal level and where you're at now. However, since we're going to be talking about storytelling, we're going to be talking about your book, we're going to be diving deep. I want to change it up today. Why not? So I'm curious, what story are you
Personally, Laura, currently living into right now. And how has it been stretching you?
This is an amazing question, Tansy. And the word which came up in my mind while I was listening to your question is uniqueness.
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And to put it in a full sentence, I would say I lead my life with the unique, my individual strengths, my individual story. And I'm always leaning in, in what I'm doing and what I'm building into my past stories, the stories which they brought me here, where I am right now, talking to you and talking to your listeners.
I'm leaning into the future story which I'm about to write and is very linked with my aspirations. These stories are very unique to individuals. There are two other elements to the uniqueness. My unique talents which could become strengths. Each and every individual has a set of 10 talents.
which they can access effortlessly every day, but they need to know that. And those talents, they really helped me to drive the actions and drive everything to the aspiration to my future story. And the fourth element, it's about the individual values, which you start cultivating them. You start to understand what are those kind of non-negotiable values.
and the non-negotiable, will never change. And people usually have like, you know, five, 10 values, but there are those kind of one or two non-negotiable, while the others, might change during your lifetime, but they are also unique. So when you ask me on what I'm tapping in right now in what I'm doing, I do believe that I'm tapping into the uniqueness, the individual uniqueness driven by unique stories, unique strengths, talents.
and their unique values.
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Mmm, and how is that stretching you past where you've been living?
I've been living not really being aware about where my strengths are. Now that I'm aware, and I will testify, it's first time when I'm talking about it, is that I just...
finalized the Gallup Strength Coach Certification Program, and I become a strength coach certified. And I learned so much and I re-established the connection with my top talents. And I'll tell you which talents I have top five. I'm a learner.
I'm an arranger. What it means, it means that I can juggle with multiple objectives in the same time and I can really arrange them and I can, in a very versatile way, I can move between them. I'm responsible, meaning that I take accountability for everything I do. I'm a restorative, which means that I'm a problem solver and I'm strategic.
And these are just my top five. I'm not gonna talk about the next five because those are, I don't wanna sound complicated. I did this assessment, I'll tell you, I did this assessment many years back, but it was shelved. It was like, it was interesting. was, you know, someone explained it to me. But nowadays when I change in the last 12 months from being a corporate citizen to being an entrepreneur,
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I realized that I need to access some resources, some things which I have, not my weaknesses, because people are very focused on fixing things which they believe that they need to be fixed and they put a lot of energy and effort there and they might not become a strength ever. So therefore, what I'm doing, I'm stretching the strengths and I use them every day because they are much more fulfilling.
short or long term and give me the satisfaction that I get where I am using the strengths and not working endlessly fixing some of my weaknesses. So to me, this is the beauty of leaning on strengths and stretching yourself and become aware and understand if I do this, how I can use my top strengths to do that. And the other way I
I think I use this uniqueness in everything I do. And it's a stretch because just moving from corporate life to entrepreneurship, it's a roller coaster. It's a very interesting journey. And you really need to tap in into with your strengths into a very different way how you make decisions, how you take actions.
the network, the people whom you are surrounded with. therefore tapping into my learnings from the past and also tapping into the strengths and my values, my own values, I'm really making a lot of progress in building a business in a country which I can call home right now and it's United Arab Emirates and based out of Dubai.
And that is beautiful. I had many fears which I busted, I would say. And I think the past learnings and the strengths, they helped me do that.
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And so I love that you shared your strengths because I see how they really play into this shift, this big life shift that you have made and where you're moving and stepping into now. mean, Laura, you've spent decades leading in boardrooms all around the world, all around the world. You've had such a diverse and rich experience. And now you're writing poetry that feels like soul.
medicine. I mean, that's a pretty big shift. I'm curious, what was the inner nudge that told you that it's time to start telling your story differently and to step into this new place?
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All right, we need to go way back. We need to go like way back.
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People might look at me right now like being an extrovert, a social animal. The fact that I speak with you, I have the courage to expose myself, videos, social media, here in podcasts. The truth is I'm an introvert. And when I was young, a teenage, I was a very
present but invisible child. This is how I define that period. I was present, I was there. Everyone could see me. Cute kids. I had a very, very cool childhood. Born in Romania under communism. Very different childhood than the Western childhood, but it was a happy one.
Being an introverted child, didn't allow me to express my emotions. How I was feeling at school, how I was feeling, you know, in a family which wasn't on a good path. My parents divorced when I was 16. It was a bit of a drama. And to me, that gap which I had to be able to share my emotions, my feelings, things which I was like, you know, trying to bring
as support to my family, I started to journal. Well, journaling at that time, that was not even a concept. Now everyone is talking about journaling, there are courses everywhere. But I started literally to put my thoughts and my emotions on paper. And because I was an introvert and shy, and I had that
fear of being judged. I said, what if I'm going to apply an encryption to it? It's like I put a code to that. And I love mathematics and poetry is mathematics. So for me was like very, very easily, I would say at that age to take the journaling, have the metaphorical encryption and
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and have these kind of beautiful poems, most of them sad and full of all that energy when you are 16, and also related to the events in my life I was going through. But that was the key to connect with my mom, and that was the key to connect with my friends. And my mom, I think for the first time, she started to get to know me.
And doing so, she tapped into that potential I had. I had a mentor for a couple of years, for two or three years. And that mentorship taught me not only that in life you always need to have mentors and role models to look up, but it also helped me to polish my writing, to be much more like expressive,
with words to know how to combine lyrics, metaphors. So to me, those two, three years of mentoring, they've been very rich and they helped me now, I don't know how many 30 years later, to really start thinking how I can bring that power up again, but with a very different purpose. Not the purpose of connecting with my mom and ex-
sharing my emotions, but with the purpose to make an impact in some other people's life and to really put them in that kind of reflection mode, to create that white space for them to reflect and to learn things about themselves. I use the poetry nowadays to offer people a mirror, a mirror where they can really look, they can read, they can reflect.
And they might be surprised about what kind of findings they come up about themselves.
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Mm-hmm. And so your poetry that you started back when you were 16 was really that mirror for your soul, a way for your introvertedness to put, to more easefully put itself out there and be given a voice. And now you're bringing that into your book as well, which your book is called Stories with Purpose.
Yes. Yes. So the book, you asked me also the question, which I didn't answer how I ended up from all that corporate journey into doing what I'm doing right now.
I was lucky enough, think, somewhere like mid-30s, I started to double down on my purpose, to really understand why I'm here. What exactly is my role on this earth? I'm not sure. I think that many people, ask themselves this question. But I was very keen in finding an answer. And at that moment,
The word which came out from all that introspection, and it was a guided exercise over three days, so it didn't come up like just reading some books. The words, actually, they were like legacy and impact. You can put these words in a different context. You create a legacy incorporation to have an impact on your customers. You can do many things.
But ultimately, as I was maturing and I was traveling the world and I understood the impact which I have on people, on conversations, I realized that my legacy is to really give people those kind of tools or a framework to help them become a better version of themselves. That is the impact.
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which I'm having. And when I left corporate a year ago, like a year-ish ago, I left it in a moment where I didn't know what I'm going to be doing. I said, you know what? I really want to connect again with my purpose. I felt very disconnected. I said, like, there is something missing here. And I took some time to reconnect with what I'm good at.
to reconnect with what I want to do, what my purpose is, why I am here, answering the question why I am here and what I have to offer. And over time, I used storytelling. Of course, in corporations, everything is storytelling, feedback, presentations, boardroom presentations, any kind of interactions. Everything is a storytelling, but in a very different way.
And there are frameworks for that. But somewhere like five years ago, I reconnected with my first storytelling. I started to write poetry. I started to put stories behind each and every poem. I started to really bring value to the poems I was writing, like stories which helps you somehow discover, are you courageous? Are you versatile?
What are your values? And doing so, I had, again, a privilege to meet someone in a women's group. And that person actually pushed me to publish. Publishing, it's a roller coaster in itself, right? And here I tapped into my learner and my strategist kind of strengths because, my God, publishing a book
you really need, now I'm at the second book which I'm going to publish in October, I learned tons from the first one. And that was a story in itself. But what I'm trying to say, I'm trying to say that as you, everyone who is in the moment of making a decision to have a significant change in life,
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Either you want to become, you want to get married, you want to become parent, you want to leave a job and to find something else, something where actually your passion is. All these kind of changes require two things.
It's a two variables equation. One, it's about knowing very well and being very self-aware about who you are as strengths, experience, past lessons. And second variable is understand your purpose and your aspirations. Because when you decide to
move from a specific space where you are doing something, where you created an image, you belong to a certain scenario and you want to create a new scenario, the question is how much the new scenario is aligned with my purpose, my values, and will that scenario bring me, is going to bring me where I want to go? These are like very simple, it's not complicated at all.
But to answer those questions, that is where actually the beauty starts and a bit of the wide space and reflection steps in.
Mm. As you were talking, all I could think about, Laura, was that you're helping to alchemize people's pain so that they can just see more clearly. And you're doing that through a way that really helped you on your journey. So you already brought up that this book, this work is to be a mirror for people helping to alchemize. Right. Yeah. Yeah. What?
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What was the reflection that you were hoping to help people see more clearly? What do you want them to open up to?
I'm gonna quote.
one message which one of my readers sent me last Sunday. That was like for me when I'm getting messages on LinkedIn from readers for me that day it's worth it you know it's like what I'm doing like this I'm saying impact pooh checked you know purpose pooh checked. Sunday I was working on my second book and suddenly I know
You hear that the phone like start pinging, pinging. And when I went to the phone, it was this amazing woman who I'm going to meet next week because I love meeting my readers. And she said like this, she said like, I just went through this bookshop and I was drawn to your book.
And I'm at the page 50 and it's such a therapeutical book and I'm looking forward to see how the book ends and what I'm gonna discover about myself. It's not me saying that, it's a reader. And I have the message, I saved the message on my LinkedIn DM and I'm super excited to meet her next week. Now, let me tell a bit of a story.
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about how the book started to frame because this book, the initial manuscript was very different than the book which is right now on Amazon. At the beginning, I was thinking that I'm just going to use poetry in a sort of like, you know, journaling to help people journaling. I said, but I was not, I didn't feel it like down to my core that this is what I want to bring into the world. And I started to do some research.
And there are a couple of things from that research which I want to share with you and your listeners. So the first story known by humankind 5,000 years ago, in fact, is a poem.
To me, that was like, oh my God. So this is the poem of Gilgamesh, King Gilgamesh. And guess what? It's a poem about a superhero because this king is viewed like a superhero, slaying dragons, doing miracles and so on and so forth. So that clicked into my head and I said, oh my God. So the first story known by humankind 5,000 years ago on 12 clay plates,
it's a superhero poem is like the power of poetry and the power of art in general. It's like unlimited. I clicked after that couple of other things in my head and I said, you know what? I think that for that matter, any form of art, I call it poetry, call it dance, calling songs, call it movies, everything is storytelling. And I clicked farther and I realized that
Over 70 % of our time in our life, we are telling stories. And there are, out of all the stories we tell, even while we sleep, we tell stories, because we tune, like we have dreams, and those are stories too, But out of all the stories we do every day, two stories are the most important ones. I'm not gonna ask you to guess, but I'm gonna say it.
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First story very important.
are the stories we tell ourselves here. Because we spend a lot of time, but a lot of time, having that internal talking. And the second stories, second type of story is very important to individual, it's your own story. The story, what you brought to where you are right now, and help you to become who you are now.
and the stories which you didn't write it yet, but they will gonna bring you where you wanna go. And those are your aspirations. So if you are, when I had this, and that was the full thinking and therefore I said, well, this book it's about to bring the awareness to people about how important stories are for them.
And there is this intro talking about all what I just said in three minutes, but it's much more detailed. And I think that resonates with many readers because it's very simple written and very, you get it very fast. And when they ended up understanding the importance of these two type of stories, I bring their experience through the book into a place where
There are 28 poems with the stories behind. So I don't give you just the poem. I'm also giving you the key. So the key to decrypt the metaphor. But what I'm also giving the reader further, I'm giving some specific, too specific mind-bending questions. So I'm calling them like this.
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which are related to the topic of the poem. The poem could be the courage, keep walking, could be the relationship with your friends, the relationship with your family, the relationship with your values, how easy is for you to be in the box or step out from the box. Because the poems, they have this theme underneath.
And through those questions, answering those questions, the reader could do two things. One, they can take those questions and find the answers for themselves, and those will be extremely insightful. And two, they can take the answers, and with the help of couple of prompts, they could really encrypt their own story in poetry. Because at the end of the book,
It's not that you have a very rich reflection process where actually you, through questioning and answering, you find new things about yourself. But you can really have a step further, take those reflections and structure them in some very simple phrases, very simple lyrics. And that could become your own unique poem. So that is the experience in the book. And this is how I
how I created and that goes back to the fact that actually each and every individual, you, I, because we are so unique, I'm calling this the unfair advantage, unfair individual advantage, right? We are so unique, like strengths, stories, future stories, values and so on. I think we all deserve to write our own story because ultimately,
We are the everyday superheroes. We are the everyday King Gilgamesh of the nowadays, maybe not slaying dragons, but slaying problems. Maybe not, you know, being like, being adventurous, like crazy and going in this kind of super adventures, but we do have our own curiosities and we want to adventure ourselves.
Speaker 1 (31:30.612)
into a future and that brings challenges and provocation. So that idea that everyone's story has a purpose and that brings the title and everyone should share their story authentic and vulnerable because ultimately they are superheroes of their own life.
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Speaker 2 (33:40.034)
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Well, and you said something really important. You said that we are always telling stories. We're always telling stories. But I also think, too, that number one, we don't know that we're always telling stories. And number two, when we do, I think that a lot of that comes from the push, the message to own your story, be unique, be authentic, right? And so it's really about
stepping into being your superhero, which I love that you have been, how you connected that. That's really cool. But what I think is so interesting about the work that you're doing with this, you're not just saying own your story, be unique or be authentic. You're actually encouraging people to find and embrace their uniqueness, which I think is a totally different concept. So I would love.
I would love for you to talk on that. Number one, why is that different? But also, what does it really mean in a world that often pushes us to fit in, not stand out when it comes to owning your story and being unique?
You know, I think that you are reading my thoughts before jumping here. I was flipping through a social media. I'm not going to say which one. I was flipping through a social media. And on that social media, everyone is saying, three steps to do that, five steps to do this. This is the framework, the solution for, I don't know.
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consistency, care, courage. And I just, I was smiling and I asked myself, how someone will know which framework is good for them and how, you know, in being floated by all these frameworks, you know, how do you know what is good for you? You you might be tempted to,
And the other thing is, actually this is very important. I'm going back to my trail of thinking before getting into this discussion. So, and after the framework, compassion, courage, care, whatever, there is, these are the weak points.
These are the don'ts. And I had a conversation about it because it started somehow to become the norm to talk to people about what they are not good at. OK? And it's true that I think this kind of
way of thinking, the negative way of thinking, it's the first one, which comes very natural to people. I believe that there is also some research behind, right? So to me, when I'm talking about the uniqueness, the individual uniqueness, I'm not telling you how unique you are, right? And what I'm just saying, I'm saying that instead of
focusing on weaknesses which will never become strengths. Why we are not focusing on what helps us move on standing up. And those are our unique talents and the unique experiences which brought us here. Because fighting a weakness, if you fight a weakness from a position of strength, saying that,
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I don't have the courage to go on social media life. I'm just giving you an example. And that was my fear a year ago. A year ago, if you're about to ask me to shoot a video or to be in a podcast, I was about to get the most anxiety out of me. I was like, no, I cannot do that. It's not me. Because I never did it before. And I was having this kind of fear of exposure, what people will think about me.
What people will think about my message. Who am I to speak? Do I have a voice? What's my message? know, like all the negative kind of things, right? And actually that was not, those were not weaknesses. There was a bit of like fears, but how I conquered my fear of exposure, I tapped into my strengths, you know, and my strengths, which one? One of the,
top 10, which I didn't speak of them at the beginning, one of the top 10 is connectedness and communication and the fact that, I'm a storytelling and I can bring myself up. And I understood that I can do it by myself. So what I did, I do it with someone else having the same fear like mine. So to me, when we are talking about fears and weaknesses,
If you tap into your strengths and to a network which can help you overcome that, it's a very different narrative than just go and say, my God, I'm not good in doing strategy. So what should I do? I should take action more consistently. I should do this. No, if you are not in good in doing strategy, go and look to your strengths and see which strengths can help you become more in doing a strategy.
And if you, for example, maybe it is not going to be your jam to do a strategy, but you surround yourself with people who are having strengths and they'll help you do that strategy. So if you flip the narrative and you are saying you push to a strength-driven narrative and tapping into some resources which are very handy to you and surround yourself with people with complementary strengths,
Speaker 1 (40:26.786)
those weaknesses that will be overcome instead of just sitting into, I need to do this. I need to go to learn more. I need to take another course. need to do that. into your strengths first and let's see if we need to do a course.
You know, as you were talking, all I could think about was how pain point and weakness marketing, all of that marketing that is surrounded about exaggerating your pain points, calling out your weaknesses, and then having this great solution for it. Honestly, that drives me insane, Laura. I can't stand it. And here's why.
Because number one, not everybody is going, whatever that weakness is being called out is not necessarily going to be easily changed for people. it is literally giving them the complex that there's something not good enough about them, which then takes me into number two, reminding people over and over and over that something is wrong.
Absolutely.
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that they're not good at something, that maybe they're being reminded or triggered, that there's a worthiness issue, right? Like it drives me crazy. And so I love what you're saying because I feel like what you're talking about is taking the power back to the person saying, here, you can shift some of these things that you deem weaknesses.
when you change your perspective and look at it differently.
Exactly, exactly. And you tap and you take action from a strength perspective, not from the perspective, I'm not worthy, I'm not doing good enough, I'm not good enough. I have a very simple exercise just for, and I think this is going to be the second time with your permission. If you allow me to share, it's a one minute exercise, but you have to help me.
Can I see? So you know that we have we both have like, you know, two hands, no, each of each of us, we have two hands. Okay. One is your dominant hand, the other one is your non dominant hand. Right. We do work with both of them. Right. But different type of things, right. So with with which hand, what is your dominant hand for writing?
Yeah, sounds good.
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Right hand.
Right hand, you are like me, right handed. Okay, fantastic. So let's do the following exercise and I'm just gonna count. I'm not having the phone for timing, but for 30 seconds, I would like you to read with your non-dominant hand the sentence, I know my strength.
and I'm just going to clock like 30 and you write continuously and we do another 30 seconds with your dominant hand. So with your non-dominant hand, start writing now, I know my strengths.
This is, this isn't looking very good.
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I am writing this, I'm pretty sure that it is not, think that it's backwards and it's not even legible. my God.
Stop. I counted to 30. Can you take the pen with your dominant hand, OK, and write the same, I know my strengths, the same continuously for 30 seconds? OK, start now.
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Okay, tell me how many times you wrote the sentence with your non-dominant hand.
Barely won.
Okay, how many times you wrote the sentence with your dominant hand?
Four.
because you acted from a position of strength. And what I could say is that you might start teaching and filling the gap to have your non-dominant, the left hand. And you can exercise every day, two, three hours to start writing with your non-dominant hand. But you'll never write as good as you are writing with your dominant hand.
Speaker 1 (45:34.73)
On top of that, you're going to put so much time and so much effort instead of fusing or using your strengths and coming from a position of strength to really look into a situation instead of looking from the witness's perspective. I love this exercise because this exercise, think, is very vivid and is really showing you what are the
scenarios when you are acting from a position of strength, your dominant hand versus from a position of weakness, your non-dominant hand. You're going to try to fix those weaknesses. You're going to invest time. You're going to invest energy. You're going to get into a frustration mode because that weakness might not ever become your strength.
So why not approaching from a position of strength? And if you need something else, tap into people having complementary strengths than yours, and you're gonna get less effort, less time, much faster to the destination.
You know, I think about how much time, energy, and money that I have invested in either courses or programs or assistance teaching me, coaching me, quote unquote, I'm using air quotes for those not watching this, teaching me how to improve a situation where it is clearly not my strength at all. It is such a weakness.
But yet I keep trying, trying, trying because I'm led to believe that if I just try harder, it will all change. When in reality, it's still back to where it was. It may have took one or two steps forward, but it is not that much of a strength at all. So Laura, how do people find out? How do people discover some of their strengths in the first place to start to shift?
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their story and learn where they can tap into their strengths so that they can step forward and heal.
Very good question. And I will share also the link. Gallup, Clifton, Strengths 34, whoever is Googling that, they are going to get into their first page where there are two options. You can have the assessment for your top five or 10 strengths.
And you also you can have the assessment for your top 34 because we as individually, we have 34 talents, natively, which they can become strengths. And depending how we use, depending how much effort we put to access them, Gallup, and I love it because I resonate it and it helps me with my own strengths.
Gallup has more than 50 years of research. So it's not another type of assessment. It's globally recognized. The research is driven tapping into individual potential, individual talents and studying that over 50 years. The assessment is 20 minutes time bound.
The results, I don't want to disclose because the results, are like absolutely, I'm not going to say mind blowing, it's eye opening. It's eye opening. And the results are coming with your strengths, with a very good description of how you use them today, in fact. Some of the blind spots, and I give you an example, I give you my own example.
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When it comes to being strategic, strategic is my fifth strength. And what it means strategic, it means that you always have a plan A, B and C if you want to go to from point A to point B, right? So you always have, you anticipate risk, you put a bit of like, you know, plan B and so on. A blind spot, a blind spot for me,
might be that I stay too much into what if, what if. And I might spend too much time and energy trying to articulate all the potential scenarios. And therefore, knowing that, and I did that in my life before understanding that strategic is one of my top talents. Now, I stopped at the second iteration.
I'm not going like endlessly. said, OK, two iterations, fantastic. If there is something else happening, I'm going to deal with that when it happens. But I'm not wasting time. So the results are coming with so much about how your talents are being displayed and used right now, including some of the things where you really need to pay attention.
I also I do coaching because I'm a strength coach certified by Gallup and I'm super excited about it. And with the guidance of one of the coaches, actually you can really start accessing your talents every day and you become aware because name it is the first thing, name your talent. You do the assessment, you name it. After that, you claim it.
you start saying, I understand how it works. You go back to some of your stories and you really understand that actually you use them even without knowing. And after that, you aim it and you start really using it intentionally every day. And that's actually, it's the recipe of
Speaker 1 (52:05.752)
how people, can improve three times more their productivity. They can improve their quality of life. They can improve their interactions because you tap into what you are good at and you drive your actions and your life based on that, not based on fixing weaknesses.
Mm-hmm. And I'll have that link down in the show notes for you to easily access and figure out what your strengths are, because that even takes me into the next thought then. So if we're learning what our strengths are, but we also have been led to believe that we have to fix our weaknesses by pushing harder or doing the things that just haven't been working.
I feel like that could really lead somebody to start saying, I don't really have a story. I don't really have a story. all of that coming from this place of maybe decreasing their thought that maybe they are unique, decreasing their thought of what they can do, shift, change, decreasing their confidence.
I feel like so many people tend to just poo poo away their own unique story because they get stuck in their head that it's just, it's something that they need to struggle and it's not unique because everybody struggles with this. So I would love to talk about those people who say, I don't have a story. What do you say to that?
What do Everyone has a story. Everyone has a story. well, I think that people are this kind of unique individuals who deserve to write their own story. And it's a very, it's a very simple, I would say, way how I'm going to be saying it.
Speaker 1 (54:15.094)
The two of us were having this conversation and we are in a point in our life because there were a couple of big aha moments which brought us here. And I'm just going to go very briefly. Memory lane, 16 years old, I discovered that I can write poetry. I moved to corporations because my country went through a big change from
communists to capitalism. I embraced corporation and I really sharpened my storytelling. I discovered my purpose, my third milestone in life. I discovered my purpose and I realized that I can do even more. I made the brave decision to connect totally with my purpose and I decided to write my first book.
These are the big milestones in someone's life, right? I bet that if you have like 30 seconds and you are just thinking, what are those big aha decision moments which brought me where I am right now to talk with Laura in this podcast about storytelling, I bet that you're going to have three to five big aha moments. When you are looking to those moments,
You start narrowing down and you start saying, OK, what that moment was about? What was the scenario? What was the scenery? Where I was? With whom? Was there any kind of challenge, tension? How I overcome that? Who helped me to do that? What solutions I found? But now, I'm just going to ask people doing the strength assessment to really start asking,
what strengths actually I was using in that very situation? Because your top five strengths, you access them even without knowing because they are embedded in you. And when you do that exercise, and of course, you know, is the challenge, how you overcoming the solutions you found, what lessons you learned. And the most important question at the end is that
Speaker 1 (56:37.802)
what it means for you, what that meant for you long term, because you carry on something out of that. For some people, it might be a very different story. It might be the moment when they decided their university, the moment when they decided to get married. There will be some divorces like that. It's another important moment. Those kind of big aha moments, if you go through this, it's a story framework, in fact. If you go to that story frame and you
pour your thoughts into paper. Actually, that is a story. It's yours. And on top of that, having now understanding the strengths, you can recognize, my God, but I just use learner. I tapped into my strength as learner because I learned how to do that. I learned how to, I don't know, search for something or you learn something new.
or I tapped into my individualization or my empathy. You know what I mean? Because when you articulate your story and you pull your strengths into your story, actually you realize that you have a lot of power, you make power.
Well, do you have an example of a moment when someone discovered their story for the first time and it changed everything?
Actually, I think it's my story.
Speaker 1 (58:10.35)
Well, yes, yes, I can give you like 30 seconds using the story framework because this is a framework which I'm going to offer to your listeners and viewers as a digital workbook for free. They can take the framework with the example and they can really start running their narrative through that.
The story goes like this. And I'm coming back to my 16 story. I love that story about me. Let's start with the further scenery. I was 16, a teenage born in a communist country. And the tension was that I was an introvert not knowing how to express my...
my feelings. I realized that journaling could become, now I'm going a bit into how I'm solving. I discovered that my journaling become a very good space where actually I can put my thoughts, my feelings, but being shy, actually I decided to put an encryption to it. So this is the solution. Now, if I am about to bring in the strengths which I know,
that I have right now, what I brought into that solutioning is the restorative, which is the problem solver. So I had a problem. I didn't know how to express. What I did, I tapped into my problem solver talent and I said, okay, I need a solution. And I found my solution. I put the encryption, right? So I go with a story. So I found the solution.
I encrypted it all. What I learned? I learned that I can connect through poetry with my mom and with my friends. And that for me changed the way how relationships started to build up. And what it meant for me, for me it meant that I realized that poetry and storytelling, it's a very
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good tool to connect with people and impact people in the same time. That's a story.
But when you look into what I used at that time, I used a lot of restorative, problem solving. I used a bit of the strategic. Even I was just 16, I used a bit because I strategized a bit, right? And of course, I use my learner a lot.
So this is how people they can connect when they start writing their story based on the story framework and they have their strength assessment. They can really connect asking the question, what are those strengths which actually I used in this story? And the level of confidence and the rise of energy realizing and mapping that is fantastic because next time they were gonna think
about writing a story, their future story from a position of strength, not fixing a weakness.
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Speaker 2 (01:01:55.976)
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You can tap the link in the show notes and make it super easy to book and get on my schedule. If your body is asking for more quiet, to be more clear, to feel more true, let's bring your energy home.
Speaker 2 (01:04:02.798)
And really, this comes back to just vulnerability. mean, you needing to be, or the person doing this needing to be vulnerable, to look at their story, to pull away and just be honest and put themselves out there. And let's be honest, in your writing, your story, in your work, it's clear that you haven't shied away from being vulnerable. You've really, I'm sure it's took time.
but you really put yourself out there. Why do you think that vulnerability is really that gate, that gateway into transformation and how that can open somebody up to discovering their story, but also their purpose and how to best move forward?
This is a very, very good question. And people are talking a lot of vulnerability these days. my vulnerability, actually it's courage, bottom line. You really need to be courageous and to also have some very clear boundaries and limits about the vulnerability. And
To me, being vulnerable and talking about experiences which it's not just that they just taught me something, but people, can take some learnings out of this. That is the kind of vulnerability, right? I come with the story of like, you know, me at the 16, but I'm not gonna double down into the divorce of my parents, for God's sake. I'm not gonna do that. It's just a story which shows how
how in a moment of, I would say, invisibility, I tried to have a voice. It's about the vulnerability, about how to find your voice in a moment where actually you don't have one. So to me, when I talk vulnerability, I talk about really bringing those stories which will inspire and will enable people
Speaker 1 (01:06:19.416)
to take a step to learn or discover something about themselves. In corporate, we were talking about walk the talk or the power of example. It's sort of like similar, not the same, but you you walk the talk. After that, I think the stories which you bring to life, anyone, they really need to build
Trust.
They need to be truthful. Vulnerability, it's a bit of like you tap into some stories which are yours. Your emotions are there. The way how you dealt with a situation is there. And that builds trust. And vulnerability and authenticity somehow go hand in hand, if I might say, right?
You feel when people are just saying a story which is like, maybe it's not yours, you know? to me, and hear me out, I don't think that everyone needs to go on social media and to do all this kind of display of, this is my story, ta-da-da.
There are people who are doing that very well, by the way. And I have some role models on social media, which they are doing in a very good way. And there is a lot of wisdom which anyone can take and there is value. There are people who are doing like poorly. But I think for anyone listening to us is just in the white space of your reflection, in the white space which you can create in your life.
Speaker 1 (01:08:17.134)
to reflect, to ask yourself some questions, it's worth it to take this story framework and start scribbling those three, five moments in your life by yourself. You don't need to show it to anyone, right? Tap into your strength and see how your strengths, they contributed to that story.
and share it when you are ready. There is no pressure, you know, there is no pressure to share your story, but just the fact you know your story, that is the important factor.
Knowing your story, knowing your strengths, is already give you that kind of leverage of like energy, enthusiasm, because you start to be like, oh my God, but this is me. I can do that. You change the, I can do that. Actually, I'm going to start doing that. I do have a story. I do have a voice. Guess what? I know it. I said it when I wish to, right? And I think just, know,
It's an individual choice at the end, fancy, that people they take this kind of accountability and responsibility, which sits with them to be aware of their own story, their own strengths, and further on to really take this into what they want to do in the future.
Speaker 2 (01:09:55.958)
You know, I love that you brought up about how you're telling or if you're telling your story on social media. I feel like there's a huge difference. You can tell. You can tell by how it's coming across and how it is verbalized when somebody is telling their story from a place of empowerment versus telling their story from a place of victim mindset or victimhood. And I think that knowing and especially
I see this so much more, I see this so often when people think that they're being vulnerable, that they should, again, I'm using air quotes here, they should be vulnerable and they try to be more vulnerable and they put it out there to the world on social media, but in the way that it's being told, it just sounds very disempowered.
Yeah, I've been there. I've been there because as I said a year ago, I was not even on social media. A year ago on LinkedIn, I had 500 connections. Half of them, they were with my former colleagues. and actually that is like a learning for me. And as we speak, I'm changing the way how I want my social media to speak to people.
and the way how I'm going to bring these four unique elements about an individual and how I'm going to be repositioning. I was just having a conversation with someone two days ago about leadership and how leadership should be. said, each and every leadership is going to be individual and is going to be based on the individual strengths.
You can ask a leader to be vulnerable. Guess what? He's not going to be vulnerable because this is not his strength. But he might be many other good things which might compensate for this. And if he's not vulnerable and talkative and chit chat, maybe he's going to hire a chief of staff which is going to have those kind of talents. You know what I mean? And everyone is like.
Speaker 1 (01:12:10.734)
And the person was telling me like, the leadership, the leaders, and today needs to be like this. I was like, I don't think so. I think each and every leader is going to lead from their position of strength. They're going to lead teams which are coming with their individual strengths. And when you are aware about your strengths, your individual team player strengths, that chemistry happening in that group is amazing.
because you're going to take decisions to do action, to delegate, to bring people up, to tap into individual talents. And those people, they will feel much more fulfilled because they're going to do things where they are good at. They will not do things which they really need to struggle with. That is the difference. So I was like, I was frustrated. said, no, they don't. It's not like a framework.
You know, you take the framework, you push a leader through and you say, you don't fit the framework. No, each and every leader is going to drive through their position of strength and talent. Simple.
Yeah. Well, you know, and that like this whole conversation also has me thinking, I mean, we talked about vulnerability. We talked about how strengths are so important in changing the perception of moving forward with your strengths, telling your story through your strengths. Right. But vulnerability can really look different depending on your background and your culture. And strengths, obviously, as we know, are going to vary from person to person. Yeah, very.
Very unique.
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Yeah, very, very unique. And, you know, with you and your background of working in over in over seven countries and five continents, you've really been out and about and have been in so many different cultures. I would love to know if you've discovered if there is a universal truth, a universal truth that that you've discovered about what makes a story powerful, no matter
Where in the world that is being told, no matter what the strength is of that person or what level of vulnerability that they're coming from, is there this universal truth?
Well, I'm not going to call it the universal truth.
think stories are not going to change. You cannot change a past story. You can drive a future story. What might change might change the way how you say it, depending on the culture, depending on the country. And I have so many stories that I always find in my back pocket a story which
which resonates with the culture, with the way how people are being brought up. And I live in Middle East these days. To me, the word which comes in my head is respect the diversity you are in.
Speaker 1 (01:15:38.702)
And I like saying all the time that I was emigrant half of my mature life. I was an emigrant. And when you are an emigrant and you are moving to a new country, even in the US, you are moving from New York to Los Angeles, there are two different styles, two different cultures. It's like, you know.
It's like moving to a new country to tell you the truth. So I think there are a couple of things which you really need to do. One is to be a very good observer and do your homework and understand what's the story of that place. What are those kinds of big cultural stories which you really need to learn?
What makes people thick, know, like, you know, thick in that space? How you behave, what are the do's and don'ts in behaviors? Think about that you are going to Japan. I went to Japan, I freaked out, I downloaded from Google everything about behaviors because you are a guest there, right?
You are not going there to make the rules. You are going there to adopt the rules. And to me, understanding that and understanding the stories of people whom you are meeting. When I go to a new place, the first thing I do, I'm more of a listener than a talker. I listen. ask questions.
Ask questions, tell me about you, tell me what you are doing, what brought you here. Tell me your story. These tell me your stories. I was listening to people telling me many things. You learn so much out of this. But most, you learn how to adopt that culture and that place. And of course, there are all the others, how the food, everything else. But I think.
Speaker 1 (01:18:02.09)
When I'm thinking about, you know, the stories I listen to when I move somewhere, I listen to those stories and I asked questions with intent for me to be able to understand how I can integrate in a smoother way in that culture with those people. And the other thing is that, especially when you move into a new team,
which is culturally diverse, the first thing which I try to understand is what is in for those people being in that job and what drives them? Because ultimately, motivation is everything in life. We are all having our own motivations, linked with purpose, linked with our life, our objectives, aspirations, whatever.
But understanding what motivates people in certain circumstances and that comes from their story, that is a priceless information because after that you understand also how you engage with those people. And the connections I've built wherever I went, I built it through storytelling. We connected at the level of telling each other stories and understanding what are our common grounds.
What are our, you know, what we value most in life? What passions we have? What we like doing? What we dislike doing, you know? And stories connect people more than anything else because you connect emotions before you create the relationships and you resonate with people through stories. So to me, it's all about understanding
diversity, having respect for the people and that diversity, and really listening to the stories for you to be able to connect with people and embrace that diversity. This is what I can say.
Speaker 2 (01:20:13.614)
I love that. Well, and I think it's important to remember that storytelling isn't just this big grandiose conversation, right? It can be something so small about what are you passionate about today? What is really exciting you about your future? know, can be something small and very everyday.
Yes, yes, yes. It could be that kind of like super cool question. I like this, like, you know, what are you passionate about? You know, I like sometimes asking this, if you want to tell me in one word, how do you feel now which which that word would be? Because people are like, you know, saying that when you ask people, hey, how are you doing? Fine, fine. You know, if you ask intentionally,
you know, no, really tell me how are you doing or can you just tell me in one word because I want to feel because people when you ask, tell me in one word that people they need to concisely, you know, they really need to narrow down to one word. They really put their heart, they put their mind there and they you might be surprised about which word they are coming, you know, like.
Yeah, yeah. Well, you know, as we're finishing up this conversation, I'm really curious. What would you say to someone who's afraid to tell their story because maybe it feels messy, it feels unfinished. It might be that the person's in the middle of unraveling and life feels very chaotic. What would you tell that person if they're afraid to go there?
Speaker 1 (01:22:03.854)
I would say like this, don't be afraid first of all. Don't be afraid. Knowing your story just for yourself, it's a very first step. Falling in love with your own story, it's the second step. And you're gonna fall in love with your own story and you're gonna be very eager and willing to share it because it's going to be yours. It's going to be connected with your strengths and it's going...
to really show the world who you are now and who you are about to become.
I love that. love that. Oh, Laura, I love talking about storytelling. Every time I think about storytelling, I think about sitting around the fire and having great conversation and hearing old stories, new stories, getting to know people. And I feel like that is what you're really encouraging today. I love that. Where can people find you?
What are you excited about in your work that's coming up? And where can they get your book?
Well, my book, Stories with Purpose, Your Story Has Purpose 2, available on Amazon and many digital platforms. I have friends telling me that, my God, I found your book on like, you know, like on Apple Books. I even didn't know, like, okay, it's on Apple Books, fantastic. But available on Amazon and major online marketplaces.
Speaker 1 (01:23:45.934)
I'm also very active on LinkedIn. I choose one social media platform and I'm active there. Now about the upcoming work, having this drive to really create a legacy through impact. I just...
write down for me one, my big objective, like, you know, that kind of vision, like, you know, aspiration. And of course, I'm having an intermediary milestones. I'm not going to talk about it. But what I would I will achieve by the end of 2030, I will impact positively the life of over a million people through my through my coaching, through my books, through the podcasts, you know,
You guys, you, Tansy, and everyone who is inviting me as guests, actually, you are all part of my plan of touching the lives of millions of people because your listeners and your viewers are part of the story. And as one of the assets and one thing which I'm going to be doing this year, as the first book, it's about stories and
enabling people to use the book like a mirror and to be able to write their own story. The second book is going to be about self-leadership. And this is something, this is a new word, which I think that the word existed, but self-leadership, it's very different in my understanding maybe that what Wikipedia is going to say.
And it's going to be a very interesting book, which is going to be the next step between stories, strengths, purpose and values, bringing all this into what I'm calling the personal power potential or equation. I'm still debating with the name, but it's a personal power potential. Your stories are your potential, but your potential is there.
Speaker 1 (01:26:09.26)
Your strength is your potential, your values. It's about individual potential. And I really want this book to help people to discover that potential beyond stories and to start using for themselves. And I'm super excited about this book, to tell you the truth.
And that is part of the plan of touching this, touching 1 million people by the end of 2030.
Well, I'll have all those links down in the show notes so that you can easily grab them and head on over to Laura's world and also keep following so that you know when that next book is coming out and get your hands onto that along with the first book. Laura. yeah, go ahead.
And the last thing for your listeners and viewers, we are going to offer the digital workbook. I think that I mentioned somewhere along the way in our conversation. But for people to really have the framework, an example, to really connect with the story.
I'm going to be offering a digital workbook which is going to help them to write simple stories, 300 words, and after that, evolving to more. But if they will continue to take some moments from their past life and going through the framework, they are going to get to that structure and maybe consistency that they will start writing continuously.
Speaker 1 (01:27:52.352)
in a way that they were going to have like, I'm going to call it the micro stories, which are part of your bigger story. And I hope that that tool is going to be helpful.
I love that. Thank you so much. And I will also have that down in the show notes too for easy access. Thank you. That is so kind and a great place for people to start if they're just not even quite sure where to start at all. Laura, do you have, you're welcome. Do you have any last words that you want to lay on the hearts of the listeners before we sign off for today?
Well, I was thinking about that. In fact, I'm going to say it like this. I'm going to use a quote from my own book. A bit like, and because we're talking strengths and we were talking stories and we just created this kind of unique blend.
which people they should live with. I would say, and I'm trying to find the quote, it's here.
The quote is that,
Speaker 1 (01:29:12.736)
Your stories are unique. And your past stories, they're going to reveal who you are right now. But your future stories are as important because they will reveal who you are going to become. And embracing that, it's an act of courage, but also it's an act of self-love.
Speaker 2 (01:29:43.576)
Thank you so much for sharing your heart and your passion and your creativity. And thank you for being here today and just telling us, reminding us why storytelling is at the core of our essence of being a human being and how we can literally transform our lives with it.
Thank you so much, Tensie, for having me. It's been a pleasure. I felt that I had a discussion with one of my very good friends. And thank you for creating the space and the energy and getting all these questions out there. And I hope that your listeners and viewers, they're going to enjoy our conversation.
Thank you. Let this land. Your story isn't proof that you're behind. It's evidence that you're becoming. When you tell the truth about where you've been, the path ahead just suddenly gets brighter. Here are some questions for you to work with this coming week to help open up your story. Which part of my story is ready to be seen with compassion, not critique?
What identity have I outgrown and who am I when I set it down? Where is courage already showing up in small ways and how can I honor it out loud? And finally, if I titled this chapter in my own words, what would I call it? If this episode moved you, a quick rating and a one line review helps this show reach the people who need it most.
Thank you for amplifying the good. Thank you for supporting this show. And until next time, keep spreading that beautiful energy you were born to share.
