The Energy Fix Episode 120 - FINAL.mp3
2025-06-23
Transcript
0:00:13 Tansy Rodgers: Welcome back to the Energy Fix, a podcast dedicated to help you balance your energetic body by diving deep into the sweet world of all things health and spirituality. My name’s Tansy and and I’m an intuitive crystal Reiki energy healer, energetic nutrition and holistic health practitioner, and a crystal jewelry designer. It’s time to talk all things energy. Let’s dive in. This week’s conversation moved me to my core.
0:00:44 Tansy Rodgers: It’s not every day that you get to sit in a sacred space with someone who speaks about God and love and the human experience with such raw truth, open hearted reverence and complete presence.
0:01:00 B: Ugh.
0:01:01 Tansy Rodgers: My guest today is Troy Hadid. Troy is a yoga teacher, an author, a speaker, and what I call a spiritual excavator. He isn’t interested in surface level self help. He’s here to question question the illusion of separation, to challenge the way that we boxed in love and boxed out God. And to remind us of the breath, the divine living thread that really connects us to every living thing available. This conversation is for the seeker. It’s for the questioner. It’s for the one who’s been feeling disconnected from source and trying to find their way back home.
0:01:48 Tansy Rodgers: We go super deep into what it means to really embody compassion and to make peace with our humanity and to evolve not through perfection, but through presence. It’s really where it all starts. Now, before we dive in, just a few quick things. First, have you subscribed to the show yet? Because if you haven’t, this is such a beautiful time to do so. And if this episode resonates, to leave a review and send a screenshot to the email in the show notes, I’ll gift you 15% off either a distance energy healing session or one of my handmade intentional infused crystal jewelry pieces.
0:02:33 Tansy Rodgers: This is how the show grows, by getting reviews and by people subscribing. And I would be so grateful for your support and your help and doing just that. And speaking of the podcast, if you are listening to this in real time, make sure on Friday to check out week two, part two of my new crystal series. It is an eight week journey through the chakras, beginning with the root of becoming or the root chakra and finishing up with the crown. This week we’re going to be talking all about the sacral chakra, the evolution of self.
0:03:14 Tansy Rodgers: You’re going to get such grounded guidance and crystal education and practices to help you connect with your own evolution. So I encourage you to check that out. The feedback that I’ve gotten so far has been incredible. And I’m so excited because this is definitely something I’ve been wanting to talk more about. Crystal healing is a large part of the work that I do, and crystal work is a large part of the work that I do. And I’m so passionate about crystals and gemstones.
0:03:44 Tansy Rodgers: So, yeah, it was time to get this onto the podcast as well. And then finally, I have a huge announcement. A really big, huge, enormous announcement. I am so excited to share that. I feel like I can officially share it now. This has been in the works, but officially I can share it. I will be co opening a brand new holistic wellness special studio in Litz, Pennsylvania.
0:04:17 B: Yay.
0:04:19 Tansy Rodgers: It is called the Lititz Mind Body Studio. We’ve signed the lease, the vision is unfolding and we officially begin with this new adventure in July. There’s going to be so much more to come, but for now, I just wanted to share my excitement. I wanted to soak up the actual energy of expansion and allow you to share that with me. Because there is some really great things that are opening up. New possibilities, new opportunities, new classes.
0:04:52 Troy Hadid: New.
0:04:53 Tansy Rodgers: Just new. Yeah. So exciting. So it is officially time that I could share that. I have been wanting to burst at the seams with excitement to tell you all about it, but I’ve just been holding back a little bit until everything was solidified and it became official. And it has. So, yeah. Keep your ears and eyes open. There is more to come. Now let’s settle in. Take a deep breath, open the heart. This is a conversation that will leave you changed.
0:05:34 Tansy Rodgers: Here’s Troy. Let’s dive in.
0:05:42 B: Welcome to the Energy Fix podcast. Troy, thank you so much for being here today.
0:05:46 Troy Hadid: Yeah, thank you for having me and for listeners, for listening. And thank you for life, you know, all of that.
0:05:55 B: You know, I think that’s the perfect way to start off this podcast. You know, my favorite thing to always ask guests right off the bat is something very real, like right in this moment. What is making you grateful for life? And what’s making you grateful for just being here and being on your journey? So to start this podcast off, is there a word or a phrase that you’re really connecting to right now that’s feeling like it is very top of mind and helping you to move forward and stay connected?
0:06:31 Troy Hadid: Yeah, well, I have two answers to that. Maybe three. You know, I have a friend, he’s also a yoga teacher, and he says. He says, dude, every other word that comes out your mouth is either God or love. So those are two constants for me. But aside from that Right now, I think truth is a big thing because I think, you know, any world we live in, especially in this spiritual, personal development, self help world, we say a lot of things and it sounds really pretty and it sounds nice and maybe it gets us and points us in a certain direction, but I still think we’re missing the truth of it. We’re missing the underlying real truth that exists in all.
0:07:34 Troy Hadid: So I would like to say truth is my word.
0:07:38 B: And Troy, that really resonates with me, especially right now. You know, before we even started this podcast, I was talking to you and saying about how I feel like things, people, leaders, have not been getting very deep. Everything feels very surface level right now. And I feel like there has been so much spiritual bypassing, so much fluff and putting the nice little bow and wrapping. Honestly, when you’re going through it, it feels like hell.
0:08:09 B: It is.
0:08:10 Tansy Rodgers: It is hard stuff.
0:08:12 B: It is not easy. And allowing yourself to see that truth can be a really scary act and behavior. So, Troy, how do you stay allowing to be in truth, seeing the truth and then following through with it?
0:08:35 Troy Hadid: Yeah, well, first and foremost, the truth of that question is that sometimes I don’t and that sometimes I can’t. And I think as long as we’re in a human body, we have to acknowledge that we won’t always know what’s true. We won’t always be able to follow that truth. The only reality is that we’re pretty clueless. We don’t really know anything. And in that, to me, you know, funny enough, I have this post schedule to go out on my social media in about an hour, and it’s all about how clueless we are, that we think we know things and there are things we’ve chosen to believe, but the fact is that we know nothing.
0:09:25 Troy Hadid: We as human beings know absolutely nothing. We as a species are clueless. And science can try to explain certain things and they may do a great job. But then I could still ask, well, how and why? How and why? How and why? Because when you really look at it, the truth is we know nothing. We choose to believe certain things, but we know nothing. And here’s the most beautiful part of that, Tanzi. A miracle is divine as something that is defined as something that cannot be explained by science or otherwise and must be attributed to a divine agency.
0:10:09 Troy Hadid: That is the only thing we know to be true, that there is a divine agency. And as long as you know, you ask the question, how do I navigate in? In other words, I navigate by reconnecting to what I call God and reconnecting to what it means to have faith. And a lot of times, you know, we hear with God and we hear with faith, and some people might twitch because they think religion and they moved away from God. Right?
0:10:47 Troy Hadid: Religion doesn’t own God. God came before religion, with. And to. To. To allow any. Now, don’t get me wrong either. I. I love the establishment, I love the church. I love religion. I think they do really amazing things and they cultivate a path that some people can deepen their relationship to God, but there are other people who have been pushed away from that path or have denounced that path and then have moved away from God completely.
0:11:22 Troy Hadid: And that is really sad. That’s really sad. So I often say, and I say in my book, if any one of us allows any experience or establishment or narrative to rob us of a personal relationship to the divine, to God, that is really sad. That is a disaster. So, you know, first chapter in my book invites people to reclaim and redefine their relationship to God, whatever that looks like for them. So back to your question.
0:12:01 Troy Hadid: Faith. How I navigate the human experience and how I try to stay aligned in truth is I have faith and I have a relationship with God and with Source. And I know that doesn’t mean things will always happen as I want them to happen. That doesn’t mean life will always be flowers and rainbows. That doesn’t mean I will always figure it out. And I understand that God sometimes will hold my hand and lead me onto a battlefield where I will be trampled.
0:12:37 Troy Hadid: But having faith is knowing that that experience, even if it doesn’t serve my personal growth and transformation, that I am in service to something bigger. And I think that a lot of time we get really caught up in our own personal experience in life because we’ve been fed this narrative that I am Troy, I am separate, I am an individual. And that is nonsense. And I think the biggest realization that anyone can have is the realization that me as an individual, as Troy, in this body, is an illusion.
0:13:25 Troy Hadid: That. That as long as I buy into that illusion, there’s so much I’m going to be missing.
0:13:36 B: Yeah, we are clueless. You said, and you said we are separate or we think that we’re separate. That is so hard to embrace and to really accept because us as humans love to have control. And when it feels like that control is being stripped and ripped from our hands, it feels like God has abandoned us, that spirit has abandoned us, and we’re just floating in this illusional state and trying so desperately to grasp control you know, I’ve had a few things in my own life very recently, and this morning, ironically, I think this is ironic because we’re having this conversation this morning. I just sat down with Spirit and I said, why?
0:14:24 B: Why is this happening right now? Why has this been happening? Why is it all of a sudden these state of affairs have been going on? And what I heard was, you have to constrict to expand. And I got this visual of being in an egg and just being. Being held, and knowing that there needs to be this time of introspection, this time of pullback, this time of rest, but also allowing the hard stuff around you to come in, do what it needs to do, and then dissolve, right? And so.
0:15:06 B: And so I know from a personal standpoint that is. It’s. It’s scary. It’s scary as hell because the control is not. It doesn’t feel like it’s there.
0:15:17 Troy Hadid: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. You know, it’s so. It’s so funny. And you’re right. We want to control. But let’s ask ourselves, why do I want to control? Right? Why do I want to control my experience? Right? Because we are governed by this. We identify with our physical body. We’re told that story from the day we’re born. I am Troy. This is my body. This is who I am. There’s so much that is wrong with that that impacts how we live our lives.
0:15:57 Troy Hadid: One is that if I allow that narrative to overcome me, then me and Tanzi will remain separate. I will forever be separate with everyone and everything around me. Right now somebody might say, all right, well, that is human experience. What’s wrong with that? Well, what’s wrong with that is that your only certainty is death. Your only certainty in your physical body and your individual identity is death.
0:16:32 Troy Hadid: Now, to go further, because we don’t always connect this part of it. There will be a point in time after we leave our bodies. Could be a year, five years, a hundred years, could be a thousand years. There will be a point in time when there’s no one remembers our name, what we did, what we accomplished, who we were, or how we contributed. Any resonance or any remembering of us as an individual will cease to exist.
0:17:10 Troy Hadid: We will dissolve back into that collective nothingness, right? So now, here’s the thing. The mind and the ego, what some might call it ego in mind, is attached to our individual identity, our experience in our body. It knows that our only certainty is dead. Therefore, it’s unconscious programming is self preservation. It’s my needs, my wants, my desires. And it perceives everything else as a threat, as separate.
0:17:50 Troy Hadid: And I’ll tell you two stories that I think help encapsulate this. You know, in my book, I. I tell a story in the same chapter about redefining God, about. I lived in a tree. I live in a forest in Trinidad, about half hour out of the city. And I lived in a tree house for about six years. And I didn’t grow up in that environment. I grew up in the city. I’m a city boy. So I remember the very first night I spent in that tree house was very uncomfortable.
0:18:28 Troy Hadid: I could scream and no one would hear me. I was in the middle of the jungle by myself in this tree house. I knew there were scorpions, there were venomous snakes, there were monkeys, there were creatures I was unfamiliar with. This was not a familiar place to me. Everything around me, it felt very uncomfortable. There was no surrounding lights, there were no noises. There were the noises of the forest.
0:18:57 Troy Hadid: Darkness, all of it. And there was a point where I was really uncomfortable. And all I wanted to do was jump in my truck and go back to my apartment. And I lay in the hammock and I took some deep breaths. And when I opened my eyes, it’s when I saw moonlight on the leaves of trees. It’s when I acknowledged trees dancing in the sky, when I saw stars. And I realized what dawned on me in a nutshell was that as long as I saw myself as separate, I perceived everything around me as a threat.
0:19:39 Troy Hadid: But as long as I saw myself as separate from everything else, guess what? I was a threat. Because I would do everything I needed to do to protect and preserve my own life, my own identity. I perceived everything as being a threat to my identity, my individual identity. I saw myself as separate rather than seeing myself as a part of all of it, a part of creation. And I think that is. That is the illusion of individual identity is the illusion of separateness.
0:20:19 Troy Hadid: And the other, other thing I’ll share with you, that I think is really beautiful. And I can talk a lot Tanji, so you can stop me at any point in time. But, you know, my biggest teacher is Jesus Christ. And you know, people are often confused because while I was born Catholic and I grew up in church, I’ve been teaching Yoga for about 20 years. And to me, the teachings of Christ are absolutely aligned with the teachings and yoga in every way whatsoever.
0:20:50 Troy Hadid: So I speak to Christ and Jesus as my biggest teacher, but I do so outside the framework of the church because the church doesn’t own Christ. Right. So just to clarify, that Sometimes people get confused, but there’s a story about, about Indian saint called Neem Karoli Baba. I don’t know if you’re familiar with him. He was Steve Job’s guru and Christian Dasit’s guru and Ram Dassit’s guru. And all these Westerners would go to him.
0:21:23 Troy Hadid: And I’m not a big guru man, but this, this name, Karoli Baba is one of the few gurus I can put my finger on. And I know he was connected to God in a very real way. And all these Westerners would come to him and they would ask him to give them things to do, give them yoga poses, give them meditation practices, give them things to do so that they would deepen, find God, so that they would be enlightened and he would always tell them, tell the truth, love people, serve people, feed people, remember God, like, what more do you want to do?
0:22:03 Troy Hadid: And there’s a story where his disciples go to him and they say Baba, Baba, which means teacher. They say, baba, give us something to do, tell us what to do so we can find God. And he tells them, meditate like Christ. And he shoos them away and they get really excited that he finally gave them something to do. So they run off and they all huddle and sit down. They said he gave us something to do, meditate like Christ.
0:22:33 Troy Hadid: But then they ask themselves, well, how did Christ meditate? So they go back to him now and they say, baba, Baba, how did Christ meditate? And the story goes that he paused for a moment and tears began to run down his cheek and really simply said he lost himself in love. That’s how he meditated, is he lost himself in love. And I think that comes back, I tell that story because how it lands for me is that I can never, we can never really even glimpse what it means to love or what we are part of.
0:23:22 Troy Hadid: Until we, we can dissolve this sense of individual identity. Until we dissolve this sense of I, I, I, me, me, me. Only then will we understand what it means to love. And only then will we understand who and what God is. You know?
0:23:44 B: You know, there’s so many NDEs, near death experiences that have talked about the sense of love that they felt when they touched the other side, that it was a feeling that they couldn’t even express into words, that the human brain could not wrap their head around that level of love and how that felt. And you know, as you were talking, all I kept thinking about was this illusion of separateness, right?
0:24:16 B: We are always looking for something, something to do, something to keep us busy. And the reality is that that just keeps us separate and it also keeps us out of love. It keeps us separate from all of that. That really being able to connect deeper into our spiritual self and being. We’re. We’re self sabotaging ourselves by putting that block up and not even realizing it.
0:24:42 Troy Hadid: Yeah, yeah. Imagine Tanzi, that, you know, I say this all the time, that even. And I hope people listen to this. Well, even the path of spiritual enlightenment or the path of realization. Think of it. We use words like self realization. We talk about individual salvation. It’s all nonsense. It’s absolute nonsense. There is no self realization beyond the dissolving of self. When you dissolve any idea of self is when you become realized.
0:25:28 Troy Hadid: Right. When you start that journey of realization. Even within religious context, the mere idea that me as an individual could achieve personal realization of salvation. I always say, if I arrived at the gates of heaven and Christ met me there, or God met me there and embraced me, and I look back and I saw my brothers and sisters suffering, whether it be in hell or wherever on earth, I’d be like, yo, God, I love you.
0:26:05 Troy Hadid: Thank you. But I’m not gonna leave them behind. Send me back. Because the reality is there is no individual self. There is no individual realization. And a spiritual path that’s often been painted as some kind of ladder, like we have to climb, that we get there before everyone else. That is your ego. That is, the ego gets caught up. It’s so tricky. It gets caught up in the. And even our spiritual journey and makes us feel that we’re in some way more evil or more realized than someone else.
0:26:47 Troy Hadid: That separation, that separation.
0:26:54 B: Well, and our ego’s perception is so. It’s so linear. It’s so linear, that ladder. Like, if I do this, then I get here, and if I. If I fall down a few wrongs now, I failed.
0:27:07 Troy Hadid: Yeah.
0:27:07 B: When in reality you have to fall down as part of that dissolving of that separateness.
0:27:15 Troy Hadid: Yeah. Fall down and suffer. You have to suffer. You know, one of the most powerful things I heard was our author. I’m sure you know him. I don’t like butchering his name, but I’ll try. Yuval Noah Yuval Harari. He’s the author of Sapiens. I heard him say in an interview once, you know, we often argue what is natural and what is unnatural, but the fact is that God is creation. So as long as something is possible, it is natural because God lives in all of it.
0:27:56 Troy Hadid: And then he goes on further to point out and of course this stuff is obvious, but we don’t always connect the dots. He goes out to point out that because something is natural or of God doesn’t mean it is life giving. Because nature also, there’s a cycle. Some things are life giving, some things are life taking. Hurricanes, natural disasters, earthquakes, fires. Those things are natural, but they also cause suffering.
0:28:31 Troy Hadid: That life isn’t all about flowers and rainbows and that we are here to experience a certain level of suffering. And that is how we grow. That is how we evolve, not just on an individual level, but also on a collective level. You know, I like to think of it, Tanti, is that. Imagine that we’re all part of one another’s curriculum. You know, and there are times in my life when I suffer and when I do absolute nonsense and I fall short of my own expectations and I eff up.
0:29:18 Troy Hadid: And these are all times when I want to come down on myself, either for being a complete idiot and knowing and not doing what I know I should have done, or maybe I’m down in a rut because I’m experiencing this suffering, but I’m experiencing that on an individual level. But the reality is that that could be part of somebody else’s curriculum, helping them learn compassion, helping them learn understanding.
0:29:51 Troy Hadid: And I, in those moments, I’m also in service to something bigger than myself, that it’s not just about me. And I think that’s what we have to remember because we’re in this body and this is our experience of life. And the ego has its path. Ego. You know, sometimes we say, kill the ego. Death of the ego. I don’t want to kill my ego. My ego has its purpose. I want to befriend it. And when I cultivate a relationship to it, then it no longer manipulates me in an unconscious way. I can now be in relationship to that.
0:30:31 Troy Hadid: But when that happens, we now realize that we are in service of something bigger, whether we recognize it or not.
0:30:41 B: Yeah, I want to step back a little bit, you know, talking about the evolution of your. Of yourself. Talking about you’ve used the term excavating your human experience is one of my favorite words ever. Yeah. Yeah, I love that.
0:30:57 Troy Hadid: What.
0:30:58 B: What took you to the tree house in the forest for six years? Why did you even start that path? What were you trying excavate?
0:31:07 Troy Hadid: God called me to live there, Tanji. You know, it’s rel. I could say that with absolute confidence. And I still live there now, but not in a tree house. You know, I had a recycling business, and I was able to Sell it. So I was able to build the house I now live in, which is a pretty, very comfortable house. It’s. It’s not tree houseish. It’s tree houseish, but it’s not ad rustic, you know. And I live a hard life.
0:31:43 Troy Hadid: It’s lonely, you know, I live alone. Not that I don’t want a partner, want a family or want kids. It hasn’t been my path yet, you know. And living alone is hard. I live a lonely existence in a lot of ways. My family is my yoga studio, my community, my friends. Luckily, I don’t live far from town. So I come into town every day and I say God sent me to live there, even though I didn’t know it at the time.
0:32:15 Troy Hadid: I think I spend a lot of time in quiet and in solitude. Even though I’m dabbling on my computer a lot, all the time. I think being in nature and spending time in nature like that, there’s something that happens. I don’t know how else to say it. I think I was guided to live that life so I could dial into certain things. That’s how I feel. And I also knew, like I tell a story in my book, I think it’s my yoga practice, you know, the very teaching. Sometimes we think of yoga and we think of exercise and sure, all these things are great, but the very foundation of yoga practice is God of all yoga practice.
0:33:05 Troy Hadid: And the very. The second teaching of the Yoga Sutra says that yoga’s cheetah vritti nirodha, which says that yoga is quieting the fluctuations of the mind. And I think when we begin to quiet the fluctuations of the mind is when we begin to hear the voice of God. And I think that it’s not that I heard a voice speak to me, you know, I mean, but God speaks to all of us. He speaks to all of us. But I think voices of the mind are so loud and voices of society are so loud. All the expectations people tell us what our life should look like, what we should do, what success looks like, what happiness looks like.
0:33:54 Troy Hadid: We have all these what I call voices of the ego. Not only our own, but everyone else’s voices of the ego that tells us who we should be and what we should, how we should live our lives. These voices plague our existence. And I think my yoga practice was what began to really help me quiet the voices of my mind so that I can now get very clear on. Some people might call it intuition, caught, call it whatever you want, intuition, voice of God, whatever.
0:34:30 Troy Hadid: But certain things become very clear and it became very clear to me that I needed to live outside of the city. And for the very first time I stood up on that lot of land, it was very clear I had to live here. And whether, whether I will spend the rest of my life there or not, I know that I was called to live there. And that is where I lived. And I’m still called to live there. Whether I live there my whole life, I hope so.
0:35:04 Troy Hadid: But I’m also, I’m also open to whatever I’m called, whatever, wherever I’m guided and whatever I’m called to do, you know?
0:35:11 Tansy Rodgers: You know, Troy and I talk a lot in this episode about embodying love. Not just talking about it, but actually feeling it in your cells. But here’s the thing, if your gut’s a mess, it’s really hard to feel anything other than bloated and foggy. That’s why I just love just thrive probiotics. It is a spore based probiotic that doesn’t just survive your stomach acid, it actually thrives all the way to your gut, where the real transformation happens.
0:35:44 Tansy Rodgers: Most probiotics, they don’t actually thrive and survive to your gut. Just thrive does. Think of it like sending little love notes to your microbiome and your microbiome, well, it will write you back with better digestion and less inflammation and way more clarity. If you want to go deeper in your healing and your presence, start with your gut. Head down to the show notes, click the link and use code TANSY15 to get 15% off your next order.
0:36:20 Tansy Rodgers: That’s code TANSY15 for 15% off your entire order.
0:36:29 B: And the fact that you listened really expands, expanded that evolution. You know, I think we need to get quiet, us as human beings, every single one of us need to get quiet so that we can evolve, so that we can expand. And we’re constantly being guided in how to do that. Maybe we’re getting the nudge to be out in nature a little bit more. Maybe we’re getting the nudge to be off of social media or to change our friend group or to change jobs, whatever it is, right? Like we’re constantly being guided.
0:37:00 B: Most people don’t listen to, most people don’t follow it. And therefore I think, and I’ve been guilty too, that that’s where the core of suffering happens is when we cut off that, that flow where we cut off that listening and that guidance and we stay stuck in the ego. And the ego is important. It keeps us safe, right? But like the ego also can keep us Stuck if we are not allowing ourselves to open up.
0:37:32 Troy Hadid: Yeah, yeah, absolutely, yeah. Voice, the way I describe it is voice of the mind and voice of the heart. Voice of the heart, that’s the frequency of God. But that voice is a delicate whisper. It’s very clear. But it’s a delicate whisper where the voice of the mind incessant loud chatter and shouting. So only when we can quiet that voice a little bit do we get these very clear, you know, and it’s not easy to know a difference.
0:38:10 Troy Hadid: It’s not easy to know difference. But the way I describe it is that a voice of your mind often sounds like this. What will people think? How will people react? What is going to happen? How will I survive? You know, it’s always in some way concerned with our individual acceptance, survival, security, safety. The voice of the mind actually just wants to be able to love and be loved. How ironic is that? The voice of the mind is fear driven.
0:38:48 Troy Hadid: But even at the root of all fears is love. At root of all our fears is our fear of not being able to love or not being loved is at the root of all fear. And that. We could talk about that. But the voice of your mind, that’s what it sounds like. It’s very fear driven. Whereas the voice of the heart is just like, do this. It just, it’s very clear, do this. And then you have to ask, okay, how? It doesn’t ask. If it asks, how do I do that?
0:39:34 Troy Hadid: And that is very different. And of course, like anything else, the more time we spend with the mind is more we begin to understand what in mind sounds like. And the more time we spend in quiet, in silence, it’s. The more time we begin to understand God. You know, it’s so funny, Tanji, if you get me started on, on Jesus Christ and that, that stuff, that’s a whole different tangent. That could be a podcast in itself, but we’re often fed a narrative of all the things we need to do to enter kingdom of heaven or to become close to God.
0:40:21 Troy Hadid: And those traditions often refer to the Bible and scripture in a lot of ways, but he was very clear. Psalms 1:18, I believe, be still and know that I am God. How clear. How. How much clearer does he need to be? Be still and know that I am God. And once you, in that stillness, once you come to know God, his second ultimate commandment or direction is. Is. Is a go to. You don’t even have to think about it.
0:41:00 Troy Hadid: Love your brothers and sisters as I have loved you. That is the ultimate spiritual practice. There Are no exceptions. It’s not love them if they’re Christian. It’s not love them if they’re Islamic. It’s not love them if they gay, straight, right wing, left wing, white, black, Indian doesn’t say love them if they have a house and make a living. They don’t say love them if they don’t do drugs or if they’re not begging on the street, it says love them full stop.
0:41:38 B: If love is that root, if love is the basis of it all, why do you think we have. Why, why do you think we have such a hard time following that simplicity of loving unconditionally as Jesus wants us to?
0:41:59 Troy Hadid: Yeah, I think, I think it all comes back to the illusion of our individual identity. This. And I think, you know what, I think one of the biggest reasons, and I’m going to talk about Jesus a little bit now, so I want to say this. I don’t think Christ has an ego. I don’t think Christ really cares whether you think, whether someone believes he walked the planet and died on a cross and resurrected or not.
0:42:35 Troy Hadid: What he cares about is that we take heed of his teachings. We look at the example he set out for us. And then Luke 17:21, he says, and again, the establishment doesn’t often teach of this. They teach that we are born sinners and that we live, that we are sinners. But Luke 17:21, he says, you will do far greater things than I have ever done. Think of that. There’s massive responsibility in that. And I think one of the biggest.
0:43:13 Troy Hadid: So I say that because if someone had resistance to this idea of Christ or Jesus, I want to reframe it for them. If it helps you to think of it as a story or a legend, then cool. But let it be a story and a legend that guides how you live your life. Because there’s so much in it, right? And I think one of the biggest teachings and biggest things in the resurrection of Christ that he wanted us to recognize is that we are not our body, that there is life after we leave our body.
0:43:55 Troy Hadid: And if there is life after we leave our body, then I am not my body and you are not your body. So if I am not my body, then why is my ultimate go to self preservation? If I really know that I am part, if I really understand that I am part of something bigger, that God lives in every individual, then I can now live my life in a way that is governed by service to that collective rather than governed by my own individual response and desires.
0:44:38 Troy Hadid: Now somebody, of course we could question this in so many ways. Question is, in so many ways, well, does that mean that we go and sell everything and give away everything? And maybe. Does it mean we have to? Not necessarily. It just means that we have to really look at our lives, because it doesn’t mean we can’t live lives where we enjoy life and enjoy certain things. Of course it doesn’t mean that life is to be enjoyed.
0:45:13 Troy Hadid: But should I be enjoying my life at the expense and suffering of someone else? Probably not. Probably not. And the reality is that the world we live in feeds that, and there’s a lot that has to change. And somebody can look at me and say, well, I live in a nice house in forest. Yeah, I do. I do. And can I live even a more simpler life? Absolutely. But it’s all about, you know, for every individual, this is their journey.
0:45:55 Troy Hadid: And I would like to believe that in every way I can, I offer my life to be of service to others in some way. As you do Tansu or you won’t do this podcast. But it’s just about really being aware of how we show up in the world and how we impact the world around us. You know, one of. One of. One of the things I love to talk about is, you know, I love to talk about the breath and the fact that there’s so much I can say about the breath. And again, that can take hours.
0:46:35 Troy Hadid: But one of my biggest realizations about the breath is that the word spirit, like holy spirit, spirit comes from Latin word spiritus. It means to breathe. And when I began to connect to my breath in a very deep way and understood the anatomy of my breath in my yoga practice is when I really started to feel God in my practice. My practice became not just like, oh, yeah, my yoga practice is prayer. It actually became a prayer.
0:47:12 Troy Hadid: And I felt. I became to feel closer and closer to God the more deeper my relationship to breath. And so when I. When I learned that the word spirit actually means breath, I was like, holy shit. Can I curse on your podcast? Sorry.
0:47:29 B: Absolutely you can.
0:47:30 Troy Hadid: Yeah. Good. Because I was trying to avoid cursing for the last half an hour. I was like, holy shit. But it makes so much sense, right? Because the breath is the one thing that connects all of us. We define ourselves by race, religion, nationality, opinion, DNA. All of it makes us separate. The breath is the one thing that makes us the same. It would make sense that there is a divine agency, any air we breathe.
0:48:04 Troy Hadid: And just to add to that, the Hebrew word ruach means God, and it means breath. The Greek word pneuma means God, and it means breath. I have come to believe that there is a divine agency. Any air we breathe, any breath. Now, I bring this up because I want to tie it back to what I was saying before. I began to see that, all right, God is moving inside of me while I practice. So my yoga practice is my time with God.
0:48:40 Troy Hadid: It became a prayer. But then it also brought me to recognize, well, hold on. I breathe 23,000 times a day. So I began to realize, what about all the times when I’m breathing and I’m not on my yoga mat? That too is prayer. You know, in the world we live in, you have the. This weird manifestation. People love it. You weird stuff. We love it. Right? Manifest this, manifest that. I have some resistance to manifestation. Because a lot of the time our manifestation is individually trivial, is how do I manifest my dreams? How do I manifest the life I want?
0:49:29 Troy Hadid: How do I manifest more money? How do I manifest love for myself? Right? All that stuff is important. Self love is important. But if my self love doesn’t serve something bigger, then it’s just selfish. Good. So we could come back to that as well. But I want this to land. Manifestation is just a new age term for prayer is all it is. Right? And I cannot choose. Get this. This comes with big responsibility.
0:50:07 Troy Hadid: It’s heavy for some people to accept. I cannot choose when I’m manifesting, and I cannot choose when I’m praying. I cannot say I pray in the morning or I pray when I go to church. So I manifest when I do a new moon ritual, or I manifest when I write in my journey, every word in my journal. Sorry. Every word, action and thought is a prayer. If God is moving and living inside of me, we are living embodiments of prayer.
0:50:47 Troy Hadid: What does that mean? Well, that means this. If I walk past a homeless person, or I’m sitting next to a homeless person, I’m not talking about someone on drugs. I’m saying I’m sitting next to a homeless person and I am eating food, and they want food, and I choose not to give them food. That is a prayer for hunger, global hunger. That is a prayer for starvation. That is a prayer for homelessness. If I walk past someone on the street and they’re asking for money, they need assistance, and I don’t take the time to feed that person, or at least to be with them, to see them, to connect with them, to make them feel loved, make them feel appreciated, even if. Sure, I might say that this is a drug addict. If I give him money, he May very well go and buy his last hit. That kills him.
0:51:55 Troy Hadid: I get that. But if I don’t spend time to be with that person and I dismiss them, that is a prayer for homelessness. That is a prayer for poverty. That is a prayer for drug addiction. That is a prayer for disconnect. Everything we do is a prayer. With that comes immense responsibility. Immense responsibility. It means we have to live our lives with so much intention. Because everything I do changes the world around me.
0:52:33 Troy Hadid: I am praying and, you know, I remember one of my biggest teachers is a teacher. One of my close friends now, but one of my biggest teachers or my absolute teacher. Her name is Sean Cohen. She’s a yoga teacher, quite popular. And I remember she looked at me once in a room of about 100 people, and I felt like maybe she wasn’t looking at me or pointing at me, but it felt like she was. And she said, everything that is wrong with our world today is because of you.
0:53:11 Troy Hadid: And I sat there, I was like, how the fuck? I was like, what the fuck? And I was ripped. Because she knew how I lived my life and what I was committed to. How could she say that? This was my mentor, my teacher. How could she say that? But I understood that if I understand my real power, we love to say my power. I’m so powerful. Yeah, look at me go. Well, if we really understand our power, we can’t just look at the flowers and rainbows and all the light and love we do any will.
0:53:50 Troy Hadid: We have to look at our own darkness. We have to look at where we see, step into, and contribute negatively. Because if we aren’t willing to look at our own darkness, then we’ll never turn that darkness back to life. So I think I went off on a tangent there. My apologies. It happens.
0:54:12 B: I love tangents.
0:54:14 Troy Hadid: Yeah. I think it’s important to recognize that we are living embodiments of prayer, that God lives within us, you know, and that we have a responsibility. We are. You know, one of the biggest things. Reasons I don’t really jam with common understandings of Christ or church or your establishment is because we’re told this narrative that we are sinners. Therefore, if. If you were to wake up every morning, Tanji, and tell yourself, I am no good, I am fat, I am ugly, I am poor, everybody would tell you, well, why are you writing that narrative for yourself?
0:54:56 Troy Hadid: It’s the same thing. If I live my entire life saying, I am a sinner, I am a sinner, I am a sinner, I am a sinner. I’m going to be a sinner. Whereas Christ was very clear, the kingdom of God lives within you. You will do far greater things than I have ever done. He was telling us we are children of God, that we have a responsibility to live. He came to set an example. And I would like to believe that I will spend the rest of my life as flawed as I am.
0:55:30 Troy Hadid: As much sin, if you want to believe in the word sin, as much wrong as I do, because I am human and I am flawed. I will live the rest of my life trying to live my life as Christ intended for me to live my life. Yeah.
0:55:49 B: You know, I want to comment something about, first off, that was beautiful and the words that you were saying. I could feel these emotions bubbling up within me because it was unlocking so many truths within myself. And so I want to add something. You talked about the manifestation part, and I feel like that is such a new age concept. A lot of science rooted in it, a lot of understanding of how it works.
0:56:21 B: But I want to add something to what you said. You talked about how it’s about our actions and our words and our love. And, you know, my highest forms of manifestation came in when I. When I was just being more enjoy and love. Yes, I had goals, yes, I had these things I wanted to accomplish, but they weren’t really in the forefront of my brain. I was literally living in moments of joy, happiness and excitement and love.
0:57:00 B: And not just for myself or the things that were going on that were good for me, quote unquote, but for literally everybody that was coming into my path. You know, I do a lot of shows and expos? With some of the work that I do, and they are my favorite thing. But I remember specifically I had these, this, this, this abundance just flowing into my life in all different forms.
0:57:27 Troy Hadid: Yeah.
0:57:28 B: When I was able to connect with people, when I was able to connect from a heart standpoint, giving more love, showing concern, showing connection, showing care. And that was when the real manifestation happened. And I remember stepping back, it was so palpable. I remember stepping back and just looking at it and saying, so this, this is it right here. Nothing else really matters because it’s going to come anyway.
0:58:01 B: Yeah, this is what matters.
0:58:03 Troy Hadid: Yeah.
0:58:04 B: Yeah.
0:58:05 Troy Hadid: I have a story for you that is going to take that home. It puts a nail in that. And I resonate so much with that, you know, and we love stories. And this one isn’t in my book because it happened after. But, you know, I went into. About two years ago, I went into this darkness retreat. And you have people doing that now you know where they go into this darkness retreat. And I had done 10 days of silence prior about 15 years before, and it was one of the most powerful experiences of my life. So I decided, you know what?
0:58:43 Troy Hadid: And I said after that I would never do it again. I was like, f that I’m done. I’m not doing that shit again. But then again, I was called and I felt, Claire, I had to go into this. This darkness retreat. And there’s a lot just to be clear. I want to be clear. I came out on day three. My intention was to stay 10 days. I came out on day three and I believe God put me out that room. And I came out that room and I called one of my closest friends shortly after. And she said, what you’re doing out?
0:59:20 Troy Hadid: And she said, we. She has a little son who’s one of my best friends, and he had that son with my newest godson. She said, we’ve. And her husband is also a really good friend of mine now. She says, we’ve been praying for you non stop, that you would get whatever you needed to get and get your ass out that room. And I was like, fuck, it worked. I think it worked because those three days was such an absolute shit show.
0:59:52 Troy Hadid: And I bring this up because I want to share with you what came up for me in that room. And one of the things that came up for me in that room was I had gone into that room to dissolve layers of my ego and my identity. I had acknowledged that we define ourselves by the external world. I am a human being because this is a wall. I am male because I know female. I believe A, B and C because someone else believes X, Y and Z.
1:00:30 Troy Hadid: In every way, we define ourselves by external worlds. So if I remove the external world, who was I? Who was I? So that is a question I got an answer to. But what I want to point out is what I realized was that it was my ego keeping me in the room that my experience was so agonizing for several reasons, including the 48 hours that led up to my doctor’s retreat. I always say my experience from the time I left Trinidad was handcrafted to fuck with me.
1:01:14 Troy Hadid: Handcrafted to fuck with me, to shatter me and break me apart, right? And we could talk about that if you like, after. But I want this to land is. I realized it was my ego keeping me in the room. I was concerned about what people would say, what people would think, what my community would say, what they would think if I came out of the room early I had also gone into the room seeking a naturally occurring psychedelic experience because I’m a sober individual, so I haven’t done plant medicine. I’ve had my experiences through breath work and yoga and.
1:01:56 Troy Hadid: And different states, but I’ve never had that kind of experience. And I know that when you’re in that prolonged darkness, your mind starts to secrete dmt. So you go into these psychedelic experiences. My ego was craving that. My ego had bought into the narrative that if you’ve had these experiences, it meant that it was like some kind of checkbox along it, along his spiritual path. It’s not right. So I realized my ego was keeping me in the room.
1:02:34 Troy Hadid: What door? One of the things that landed for me in that room as well. On top of that, riding off of that, I feel like, you know, this Indian saint named Caroly Baba. I feel very close to. And I feel like a lot of it teaches teachings came to me in that room as well. And he talked a lot about Christ. But I recognize this. All our spirit. I’m gonna choose my words carefully. All our practices, all our spiritual practices are absolutely meaningless.
1:03:14 Troy Hadid: And I use it. I use profanity for exaggeration because they are meaningless. They are useful, but they are meaningless. It doesn’t matter how much yoga I do, how much plant ceremonies, how much meditation, how much ayahuasca, how much I go to church, how much I go to temple or mosque or sit in silence, or how long or how often I sit in darkness. None of it means anything. They all help us get our head out our ass.
1:03:49 Troy Hadid: There are useful practices that help us get over ourselves, but there’s only one spiritual practice that matters, that means anything, and that is God and love. And they are one and the same. That is the only thing that matters. Our ability to see God in the eyes of every human being, to see God in all of creation, and then to live accordingly, to show up from a place and love accordingly. And I’ll also put a pin there and say, love is in all those flowers and rainbows, flowing away from showing up from a place of love.
1:04:33 Troy Hadid: Could be holding a mirror up. It could be showing someone the one thing they don’t want to see. It could be telling someone the one thing that means we’re gonna lose them. That’s love. Love is the intention, not the action. And I think love and God, that is the ultimate spiritual practice. I will also add this because I speak. I think it speaks to what you said before as well. I went in there asking a question, who am I?
1:05:10 Troy Hadid: Right? And this is what landed for me, and it was very clear. I am the resonance and vibration of my life. I am not Troy. I am not my body. But every action, word and thought has a resonance. It is impossible for Tanzi and Troy to to leave this podcast as the same people that came into it. Every interaction, even listeners, you’ve been changed. Sorry to let you know you’re not no longer the same. Every interaction we have with someone changes them.
1:05:48 Troy Hadid: We leave a resonance, we leave a vibration. And we now live in all of their experiences. From that point forward, our life has a resonance. It has a vibration that is our contribution to human consciousness, to the evolution of human consciousness. That is who we are. That energy is who we are. Nothing that is attached to our physical name and form can define us. Okay, I’m done.
1:06:31 B: So how do we change that vibrational resonance? If nothing matters other than God and love, how do we go? I guess I’m speaking more from those. For those individuals whose heads are really stuck far up their ass and they have a long way to go to even get to that baseline of just allowing themselves to open, how do they start to shift the vibrational resonance for real?
1:07:00 Tansy Rodgers: So let’s be real. Awakening the soul doesn’t always feel like soft light and angel choirs. Sometimes it’s inflammation and discomfort and tension showing up as our body’s way of saying, hey, listen up. That’s why I love turmeric gold by fusionary formulas. It’s not your average turmeric. It’s got ayurvedic herbs, powerful absorption and anti inflammatory magic that helps the body feel less reactive and more ready.
1:07:34 Tansy Rodgers: Because when you’re doing the deep spiritual work your nervous system and joints deserve and need some extra TLC because it takes a lot out of you. You need to fill yourself back up and support the body a little bit deeper as you do all of this deep spiritual and emotional work. Head down to the show notes. You can find the link there and make sure that you click on that link and use the code TANSY15 to get 15. 15% off your entire order.
1:08:09 Tansy Rodgers: That’s TANSY15 for 15% off. I can’t wait to see what you get and how much better your body and your deep diving work go.
1:08:23 Troy Hadid: Yeah, I think we all have a long way to go. I want to say that again. The mere idea that I am somehow more dialed in, more evolved than anyone else, that’s the ego sneaking and it happens to me all the time. Of course we look at people, we’re like, what the fuck Are you thinking like, why are you not getting this? Maybe because they’ve had no one in their life to show them or teach them or love them.
1:08:54 Troy Hadid: Maybe that’s why they’re not getting it. But to answer your question, I think it really begins first of all with cultivating a relationship with the mind. Because if you don’t have a relationship with the mind, then we’re just a puppet. And the mind is going to continuously manipulate our experience of life. And what drives the mind is my experience, my wants, mine is my desires, my security. And by my understand this is also important for us to know.
1:09:33 Troy Hadid: When I say my identity, I also mean my family, my social circles. Those are all parts of your identity. Those are all extensions of your identity. But can we love beyond that? Can we love a person that doesn’t agree with you on the other side of the fence? Can we love the person we’ll never see again? Can we love the person that runs into our car? Can we love leaders, our will and our nation that are making really self centered, ego driven, economically driven decisions?
1:10:19 Troy Hadid: Can we still love them and pray for them? I think a relationship, cultivating a relationship with a mind is essential. And I think the words we speak are essential. And I think a relationship to some form of divinity or God, I think prayer is really important. And you know, I, I remembered when I prayed the words. And I still, on the odd occasion, I’ll still utter words, God, teach me how to love. And I remember one of my teachers telling me, buckle the fuck up.
1:11:04 Troy Hadid: Because if those are words, you’re just saying, if there, if that is what you are committing to, that you’re asking God to teach you how to love, then buckle up. Because it’s not going to be easy. You’re going to have to experience some shit for that to happen, you know, So I would just invite people to cultivate a relationship with their mind. Understand that we have all been conditioned. And you know, one of my favorite quotes is when Einstein, I think, says that intelligence is the ability to question.
1:11:46 Troy Hadid: And I think if we blindly believe what we think we know as true and we don’t question our own narratives and our own conditioning, then we’re going to be stuck. We’re going to become stuck and stagnant and we’re going to miss it. I think we just really have to look at all our conditioning, our narratives, cultivate it in a relationship with our mind and cultivate a relationship to God, a real one, whatever that looks like. God doesn’t have a form. If you want to Give God a different form or a different name. Do it.
1:12:22 Troy Hadid: What I call God, Jim. Call God, Jim. God doesn’t have our ego. We can’t put in our ego on God. You know, I sometimes say, Tansy, you know, I think we were told that we were made in the image and likeness of God. So then we put our ego on God and we made God more like us. A God that governs people by fear, a God that is judgmental, a God that manipulates. A God that tries to bring judgment and brimstone into relationship.
1:12:58 Troy Hadid: God doesn’t do that. God loves what, what was meant to come from that is that we could embody more of what God would God represents. Not put ego on God. It’s the other way around. Be more like God, you know. And I think in so many ways we’ve put this ego on God. But if somebody needs to redefine what God this redefine.
1:13:26 B: Well, I think that’s one of my biggest questions that you’re talking here. You know, myself included on this. Been burned by religion and, and, and especially for those who maybe feel too messy to be spiritual and, and they’ve really have this, this wounded relationship with spirit and God and, and just wondering, well, how do I even come back to loving again? How do I come home to that and to trust that what I am believing in, what I’m moving forward to, what I’m trusting in again is not going to burn me again?
1:14:08 Troy Hadid: Yeah. Yeah. You know, I try to be really clear, Tanji, that I love religion and I love the church and I love the establishment and I have no reason in condemning it and bringing judgment upon it because I think there are a lot of beautiful things that have come out of it and still do come out of it. They beautiful men and women of God that come through church and religion. But I think there’s a lot of misalignment and I think there’s a lot of misrepresentation.
1:14:48 Troy Hadid: And I’m going to say it like this. How sad would it be if someone did not reclaim their relationship to God and allowed that experience to rob them of it? That would be sad. That would mean you would give your power to that experience. You’re going to allow that experience and that person to rob of you, your relationship to God? That would be sad. And you know, I also say same thing with Christ, right? Because you have God and you have Jesus Christ and even Christ never allowed himself to be called God.
1:15:36 Troy Hadid: And I don’t think he would as well. But even if someone reclaimed their relationship To Christ, Like Christ doesn’t belong to the church. Christ existed and brought his teachings to us before any establishment of the church. One can even question if the church was a church we know today was actually born out of the lineage that Christ intended. That’s a whole different conversation. I’m not a scholar, but there are a lot of evidence and scriptures out there and teachings that are rooted in history that are not recognized by the establishment.
1:16:24 Troy Hadid: And I’m not saying someone to blindly believe that, but question what you’re told. Do your own research. You know, I remember I had a convo with a friend once, and she was. She. She was. She’s big into church, which is a beautiful thing. And I love and respect the church. But, you know, sometimes I have to tell people, you know, there are more than four gospels, right? And they will say, what? Like, yeah, the only gospels are not Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.
1:17:04 Troy Hadid: Those are the only canonized gospels. But there’s the Gospel of Judas that. The Gospel of Mary Magdalene that he goes to have Thomas, that he goes to have the. You know, there’s so many different gospels and teachings of Christ that are rooted. Some of them even date back to before Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. So I just invite people to read those as well. And I think for me, you know, it was. I was really young when I acknowledge. I remember. I think I was in communion or during my communion or confirmation in church when I.
1:17:47 Troy Hadid: I raised my hand and I said something like, christ would not teach that. Christ would not teach that. And I remember being sent to the back of the room because I felt so close to Christ. And I invite people to question or look at where your loyalty and commitment lies. Because I know Christ and I know what Christ would teach, and I know what Christ would endorse, and I know what Christ would want. And a lot of the times, the establishment does not always represent that.
1:18:32 Troy Hadid: And I just invite everyone to acknowledge that they are different. I’m not trying to condone or judge the establishment, but just be aware that they are different. If you are honestly and authentically doing your own research and study, and in your heart, know Christ as a man, not as a church, as a man and a teacher. And your savior, if you see him in that way, what would he have taught? What would he represent?
1:19:08 Troy Hadid: And for those like yourself that may have been scarred or moved away from God or moved away from Christ, regardless of what religion or what establishment, I would really invite them to reclaim it, because that’s what God will want. Reclaim it.
1:19:27 B: You know, it was a really long time. It was a really long time of having this sour taste in my mouth every time that I even thought about the name Jesus Christ or God or Church because of some of the burning that happened for me throughout my experience. However, however, over the past couple years, as I’ve healed that relationship, as I have allowed myself to see Christ as more of that new neutral place in the essence of the existence and of the messaging, I really learned and understood Christ is a pretty cool dude.
1:20:09 B: He has. He has some beautiful meanings. And when you look, when you allow yourself to. To step away from any of the, you know, this is, again, this could be a whole other podcast to step away from the agendas that were. That created the narrative that is. And allow yourself to see the messaging of some of the lost books. Mary Magdalene, for example. You will really, you will see and feel, I would even say, palpably in your heart, feel the love that just pours from all of that and the truth of just the messaging.
1:20:52 B: When you take away all of the conditioning that I think that I think so much. And again, I don’t want to condemn any of the organization, but when you take away that maybe narrative that the church may have put into place, you’ll really see where it’s all rooted from, which is that place of love.
1:21:17 Troy Hadid: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. And you know what? People also forget? Hearing you talk like Christ was also a revolutionary. I don’t think people really, really get this. He wasn’t all, like, peaceful, like, he was a rebel. He rocked the boat, he sturdy pot. He turned everything upside down. And I think any true follower of Christ has to be willing to do that. And I remember, you know, just two days ago, I was sitting with my therapist and it was my.
1:21:56 Troy Hadid: And I like to put a pin here because it is Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month, and I want to endorse that. Mental health is a real thing and therapist helps us be better human human beings. Therapy helps do that. So, yes, I think everyone should go to therapy as long as they can avoid it, afford it. But yes. So I’m sitting with my therapist and certain things are coming up for me, right? And I’m talking about certain things that I know I have to speak to openly and certain things I have to give a voice to on my platform, and I start to tremble and I start to shake physically.
1:22:43 Troy Hadid: I could feel it erupting within me and even right now thinking of it, because I know that when I do this, I can. There are a lot of people that not just might unfollow and unfriendly. But I can lose a lot of people in my life, and I already feel sometimes like I’m alone, you know, like I live. It’s a lonely path sometimes. And. And I could feel it come up inside of me. And funny enough, my therapist says that’s what Christ did.
1:23:23 Troy Hadid: And. And I knew right away. I knew it’s what I have to do. And I think we all have those moments. But Christ questioned. Christ was committed to truth, and he knew truth. And I think we as ourselves, in order to discover that truth, we have to question, even question, our own beliefs, our own belief systems, our own identity, our own narratives. And when we discover that truth, embodying that truth, that’s a whole different level of courage.
1:24:03 Troy Hadid: Yeah.
1:24:06 B: Well, let’s. Let’s talk about your book. Let’s talk about your book. Your book is called My Name is Love. And for first, I. You can just tell there’s so much vulnerability in there. And I would love to talk about what made you write the book, what inspired you to put it out there. And, you know, were there any parts that were really hard to write? Any parts that really maybe even scared you a little bit, but you knew they needed to be shared?
1:24:43 Troy Hadid: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Well, you know, it’s so funny you asked what made me write a book. Well, first of all, I knew I was going to write a book at 19 years old. And I knew then it was going to be called Popcorn in My Pocket. And this book was called Popcorn in My Pocket up until six months before publishing. And I had some literary friends who are authors, and my editor, they’re like, yo, they say, no, Popcorn in My Pocket.
1:25:15 Troy Hadid: There’s like, cool name. But this book has so much substance and depth that that name does not do it justice. And what got me to finally write. Well, I tried to write this book many times. Time was never right. And I think time was eventually right. And it became very clear. And one of the reasons I sat down to write this book was something you mentioned in the very beginning, before we were even recorded, and that is that in the world today, along its spiritual path and this journey of realization or whatever, we’re saying a lot of things.
1:26:00 Troy Hadid: We’re reposting the right things. We’re looking in the right directions. We’re reading. You write books. Our intention is great, but there’s something we’re missing and we’re not connecting the dots. And part of that is that we’re not asking a question, how does this apply to my life? And there’s A lot of convenience in us deciding how and where to apply and how and where it doesn’t. That was one of my driving forces for writing this book, is I felt there was a lot we were missing and I wanted to help connect some of those dots.
1:26:46 Troy Hadid: So the book essentially is some memoir, storytelling kind of stuff. It’s some philosophy, some teaching, some reflection. And at the end of every chapter, there’s a few questions that help people kind of integrate it into their life and answer that question, how does this apply to me? What’s funny is when I started writing a book, there are two things I knew for certain. One, I didn’t want questions at the end of the chapter.
1:27:23 Troy Hadid: And the second thing I did not want. Funny enough, I don’t have the book with me now to show you a picture, but I didn’t want my face on the COVID And right now there’s my face on cover. But when that there’s a story I tell any book about. When that picture was taken, it was an accident. It wasn’t a photo shoot. We weren’t trying to take a photo, cover photo of the book. It was taken by a friend or at that time a student who had come to do a yoga teacher training. And she was a photographer and she wanted, she begged me at the end of the training to do a quick photo shoot.
1:28:05 Troy Hadid: I didn’t want to. I was exhausted, I was tired, I was ripped to shreds. I’d just been through a two week intensive yoga teacher training. I didn’t want to take a photo, but I wanted. She came from France, so. And I loved and appreciated her, so I wanted to do her that favor. I thought I was doing her a favor, right? And after four minutes into that photo shoot, she said, okay, we’re done. I got it.
1:28:38 Troy Hadid: I was like, what? She said, four minutes. She said, yeah, I got it. Like, cool. And then two weeks later, I look at this photo and Tanji, I swear to you, the first thing I thought was, who the fuck is that? Because she captured something in that photo that I say. It’s part of me that I haven’t met yet. And she knew exactly what she was doing. And after that photo shoot, I, I say to her name with Laura Stevens, I say, laura, what kind of photographer are you?
1:29:22 Troy Hadid: She’s like, I’m a portrait photographer. I’m like, you take portraits of who? She’s like, celebrities. I’m like, what kind of celebrities? She’s like, everyone. Politicians, movie stars, artist. And when I now go and research her name, I realize she’s a big deal. I didn’t realize she was a big deal, but she. No wonder she knew her shit. And she waited. She waited until after the training when she. I am assuming she knew I had nothing more to protect.
1:30:01 Troy Hadid: There were no. There was nothing else left. I had nothing more to lose. I had given everything. There were no more layers, no more filters. And a friend of mine once looked at that and they said, this photo doesn’t match your book. I said, what do you mean? They said, well, the name says my name is Ebook. Said my name is Love. But that photo looks like the most powerful man in the world. Like he has nothing to lose.
1:30:32 Troy Hadid: It’s like. Exactly. He has nothing, no other, no part of himself to lose in that moment. So he actually knew what love was. And in that moment that lives within all of us. What she captured in that moment lives within all of us. And the reason I eventually decided on my name is Love. You know, I sat with my editor. We went through a few options, but it’s the only thing I could identify with. If I identify with anything outside of attaching my identity, then it makes it create separation, a Chris division.
1:31:20 Troy Hadid: If I remember that at my very core, I am Love, that I am God, that God lives within me as he does within everyone else, then it reminds me that we’re all the same. And it dissolves all that illusion, that separateness, that. That difference. And that’s the only thing I can truly or ever want to truly identify, fight with. Yeah.
1:31:49 B: That’s an amazing story, by the way. I. I love that your face ended up on the book, even though that’s not what you wanted to. But obviously it was the perfect accompaniment to. To the title of that book. So beautiful.
1:32:04 Troy Hadid: Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. I can’t wait till you read it.
1:32:08 B: I can’t wait to read it.
1:32:09 Troy Hadid: You might call me and say, let me get you back.
1:32:13 B: I can’t wait to, too. I mean, this conversation is so, so inspirational and really, really talked to my soul. I can’t wait to read the book, too. I feel like it’s going to be just as juicy.
1:32:26 Troy Hadid: Yeah, it’s beautiful.
1:32:28 B: Well, and for the listeners, you are doing something special. Do you want to tell the listeners what you’re doing for this podcast?
1:32:37 Troy Hadid: Absolutely. So last October, I released my audiobook, which I read myself. So if you like the accent, then it’ll be music to your ears. It was really hard to do. It was really hard to do. But I’m gonna give away 50 free copies of the audiobook and I Think we’ll put a link in the bio bio link and show notes or whatever.
1:33:05 B: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’ll have those links down in the show notes and if you, if you don’t grab it here, don’t worry, it’ll be on all the other places that you follow the energy fix and you follow me and my work. So that will be out.
1:33:20 Troy Hadid: It is of course on Amazon, audible, troyhattie.com they could find it anywhere.
1:33:26 B: Yeah. So speaking of that, speaking that where can people find you, where are you hanging out and what are you you most excited about in your work or life? That’s coming up right now?
1:33:38 Troy Hadid: Yeah, well, I’m working on book two, which haven’t touched for a few months. I’ve been going through navigating the Feeling and navigating, but they can find [email protected] I’m really active on Instagram and TikTok now. I’ve jumped into your social media thing and it’s actually been beautiful. It’s, it’s given me a sense of purpose and I could guarantee that if anybody wants to follow me on social media, I will bring you content that will change your life.
1:34:11 Troy Hadid: That is a promise. And then, yeah, my book is also available at Troyadi.com, the Audible book, all of that stuff. Audible, Amazon, I prefer Instagram. That’s what I’m most active on as a social media platform. And if anybody wants to reach out to me or has questions or any of that kind of stuff, feel free to reach out. I will answer them in any way I can. I am really excited. They have some retreats coming up.
1:34:40 Troy Hadid: I have a retreat in Baja, Mexico at the end of October. I have one in Panama in May next year, May 2026. So I’m excited about that stuff. And you know, this work has also allowed me to work one on one with people. Whether you want to call it coaching or just teaching people how to breathe so much people don’t know how to breathe. That, that has really been exciting me. I’ve been doing a lot of speaking in the corporate world, which also has been kind of fired up.
1:35:16 Troy Hadid: So yeah, life in general is, has been good. Right now it feels like a world of possibilities.
1:35:26 B: I, I, yeah, I just appreciate you, I appreciate these messages. We need more of these messages and these conversations. Getting out to the world, especially right now when there’s so many people craving something deeper. And we as a species, as a human consciousness is evolving rapidly right now. The support and getting, stripping away the bullshit, stripping away the fluff, I am just. I’m over the fluff and so stripping that stuff away and just really getting to the simplistic root of it all.
1:36:02 B: And that is where I think that you are and where you’re bringing. You’re leading people to. So I appreciate you so much. Do you have any last words that you would like to lay on the hearts of the listeners?
1:36:16 Troy Hadid: Yeah, I will. I will. Definitely. Two things. One thing I want to say is, first of all, thank you, Tanzu, because I also acknowledge how much work it takes to actually have a podcast and get people like me a voice. And sometimes I feel listeners don’t always recognize how much work it takes and commitment it takes. So one thing I want to do is acknowledge you and say thank you. And also what I would tell listeners is, you know, one of my favorite things is quotes. It’s a message from our environmentalist called Gene Goodall.
1:37:03 Troy Hadid: She says, don’t ask how if I can change the world, because we do change the world every day. In everything we do, we change the world and we impact people around us. So I would just like to invite listeners to really acknowledge their power, that they change the world every day, that they make a difference in the world every day, and to cultivate their own relationship to God if they need to, and deepen their relationship to God.
1:37:34 Troy Hadid: Because when you really experience God, I’ll try not to go on for another hour with this. But there’s a difference. By being told of God and experiencing God and knowing God, I can tell you of the taste of a fruit, but you’ll actually never know it unless you experience it yourself. And I think for a lot of us, we’ve told of God, but we haven’t really experienced God or cultivated our own personal divine relationship with God.
1:38:06 Troy Hadid: And I would invite people to do that, whatever that looks like. And I also would love to say to listeners, I love you and I appreciate you. And to you, Tanzi, I love you and I appreciate you. Thank you for having me.
1:38:24 B: Thank you so much.
1:38:27 Troy Hadid: Yeah.
1:38:31 Tansy Rodgers: Troy reminded me of something so simple and so profound today that God is not somewhere far away. And healing isn’t something that we earn. It’s right here in the breath, in our awareness, in the way that we choose to show up. So as you move through your day, I invite you to reflect. Where have you forgotten your own divine nature? And what would it feel like to live love, not as a concept, but as a daily practice?
1:39:05 Tansy Rodgers: And can you let your next inhale be your return back to that sacred remembering of who you innately are. If this episode stirred something in you, share it. Let it ripple. Leave a positive review and allow this show to get into the hands, the hearts, the ears, the minds of everybody who needs to hear it right now. And if your heart is craving more support through crystal energy, deep healing sessions or community, check out the links in the show notes.
1:39:43 Tansy Rodgers: I and Troy have got your back. Until next time. Keep spreading that beautiful energy you were born to share.
